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NOVEMBER 22, 2018 THURSDAY 11 AM - HAPPY THANKSGIVING! May your turkey be moist and your surroundings warm and cozy. NOVEMBER 6, 2018 TUESDAY 7 AM - ANOTHER REASON TO VOTE TODAY Here’s a MAJOR FREEBIE for voters today as HENRY FORD MUSEUM in DEARBORN offers free admission when you show your “I Voted” sticker. Tickets are $23 normally. www.thehenryford.org/current-events/calendar/rockwell-roosevelt-the-four-freedoms This place is world famous for good reason! THE WHAT? HENRY FORD MUSEUM is a part of what they call THE HENRY FORD for some reason... which also encompasses GREENFIELD VILLAGE, an authentic little town like you wouldn’t believe! Confused? Just go, and prepare to be WOWED...BIG TIME. NOVEMBER 5, 2018 MONDAY 3 AM - THE CAN REMAINS UNTIPPED There’s a crazy album cover you may have seen by THE WHO that’s reminding me of EXIT 13 in FLINT right now... A GIANT CAN OF BEANS has been spilled...into a bathtub containing their flamboyant singer Roger Daltry of all things...ah, those comic Brits...lookie here: www.rollingstone.com/music-news/b-o-baked-beans-buns-and-the-who-188382/ Anyways...so we were talking to the operator of EXIT 13 about future plans after a great trip thru the haunt...it went something like this: “OMG! REALLY?” “Yup, it should be ready for next season.” “Hey, that’s fabulous! Can we tell the public?” “Not yet, please...but we’re really excited about it!” NOT LIKE ROGER We NEVER SPILL THE BEANS, but this much we can tell you. It’s BIG...REALLY BIG...and it will literally add a whole new dimension to EXIT 13! We can’t wait! EXIT 13 BLEW US AWAY this season with their highly physical hands-on approach, and we KNOW they’re gonna do this right. They have a proven track record, and the know-how to do what they’re planning! NOVEMBER 4, 2018 SUNDAY 3 AM - TAKE A WALK ON THE DARKSYDE Oh, bliss! What a great ending to the season, at DARKSYDE ACRES in JONESVILLE last night with a massive crowd of happy haunters. The setup is brilliant. Just one queue line leads to all 5 attractions that occupy over 70,000 square feet, with a path running 1 1/2 mile! The food was outrageously good too, thanks to onsite catering from HILLBILLY BONE BBQ...YUM! Full review coming, and stay tuned for some big news later today... NOVEMBER 3, 2018 SATURDAY 3 PM - ALL DRESSED UP WITH A FEW THOUSAND FRIENDS Hot on the heels of Halloween is another chance to put on an outrageous costume and not be out of place. A SALUTE TO SAILOR MOON It’s YOUMACON 2018, and it’s happening Nov. 1 - 4 in Detroit at the COBO CENTER. www.youmacon.com From their website: “Youmacon is a popular culture event similar to most Comic Cons, however instead of focusing on comic books, Youmacon is a celebration of Japanese popular culture and its influence on our own culture over the past few decades. Common themes throughout the event are Anime (Japanese animation), Video Games, Japanese style artwork and comics, and the rising internet culture influenced by all of the above. Youmacon brings a unique all-ages mix of interactive events, celebrity guest panels, and live musical performances to Downtown Detroit. One of its most popular events, Live Action Mario Party, emulates the video game experience often filling the room to fire code capacity. Players participate in gameshow-like mini-games to help their teams advance and win. Wearing costumes, or Cosplay as it’s known at conventions, is very popular with attendees of Youmacon. It is not uncommon to walk into a pair of Italian plumbers in overalls on the escalator, only to meet someone dressed as Edward Elric or Master Chief from Halo minutes later.” NOVEMBER 3, 2018 SATURDAY 2 PM - NEVER WOULD WE EVER About the upcoming 2018 ZIOPTIS AWARDS: After several years of not having awards, we’ve decided it’s time to have them again after seeing so many amazing things this season. However, there will NOT be an overall “BEST HAUNT OF THE YEAR AWARD.” “HUH? WHY NOT, ZIOPTIS?” This has been a really strange season for us, with many unexpected problems that prevented us from visiting many key haunts...any of which could potentially have earned the “BEST HAUNT OF THE YEAR AWARD.” To give that award would be unfair to haunts we missed such as: BESTMAZE, BLAKE’S, BONADEO FARMS, THE CRYPT, EREBUS, GORE GROUNDS, THE HAUNT, HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR, HAUNTING IN IRISH HILLS, NIGHTSTALKERS, NILES SCREAM PARK, THE PUMPKIN FACTORY, ROTTEN MANOR, SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK, SHAWHAVEN FARMS, SLAUGHTER HOUSE, SLAUGHTERED AT SUNDOWN, and TERROR ON 27. The awards will celebrate the individual achievements of haunts we visited. Our purpose is to the promote the entire haunt scene, not pit one house against another or compare them! As in past years, the awards will be given at the end of the year. Also as in past years, we’ll alert you to OFF SEASON HAUNT EVENTS so stay tuned! NOVEMBER 2, 2018 FRIDAY 3 AM - THE LAST GASP! This is it. Your last chance to go haunting this season...BOO HOO! ): CALL NOW! / AVOID FUTURE REGRET & SHAME! Besides the “BLACKOUT” events, the haunts in FULL SWING this weekend are: AZRA CHAMBER OF HORRORS HAUNTED HOUSE, MADISON HEIGHTS - A dynamic first year haunt with quirky edges and HIGH INTENSITY THRILLS AND CHILLS! DARKSYDE ACRES, JONESVILLE - A first class farm haunt that’s set a goal of becoming the WORLD’S LARGEST HAUNTED ATTRACTION! EREBUS, PONTIAC - The PREMIERE MEGA HAUNT in the Detroit Haunt Market by MR. HAUNTED HOUSE, who started with a trailer haunt called HAUNTED GALLERY. An AMERICAN SUCCESS STORY like no other! HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION, WESTLAND - An up and coming STAR OF THE DETROIT HAUNT MARKET that reinvents itself constantly, ever evolving its creativity and fan base as a result. THE SCREAM MACHINE, TAYLOR - Downriver’s LONGEST RUNNING HAUNT for good reason, totally revamped again for 2018 with classic horror scenes to die for! So which of these should you hit? ALL OF THEM, if you can! We’ve had awesome experiences at every one of them, and plan to do so again THIS WEEKEND if humanly possible... Hey, come join us...we’ll be the ones right in the middle of thousands of screaming haunt fans! (; NOVEMBER 1, 2018 THURSDAY 2 PM - THE COWS COME HOME & THE FAT LADY SINGS This is the LAST HURRAH! Here’s the list of haunts open this weekend, Friday & Saturday November 2 & 3: AZRA, DARKSYDE ACRES, EREBUS, GORE GROUNDS*, THE HAUNT*, HUSH, NILES SCREAM PARK*, and THE SCREAM MACHINE * = Please note - GORE GROUNDS, THE HAUNT, and NILES SCREAM PARK will have BLACKOUT NIGHTS, not the regular show. Usually, this means the lighting fixtures and sound equipment have been removed but the props are still in place. Groups are given GLOW STICKS with which they make their way through. GORE GROUNDS will also have BLACKOUT NIGHTS on Nov. 9 & 10. Also, HAUNTING IN IRISH HILLS will be open on November 3rd only. NOVEMBER 1, 2018 THURSDAY 2 AM - SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION We went out in a BLAZE OF GLORY on Halloween night! With excellent choices of ROTTEN MANOR, EREBUS, DARKSYDE ACRES, and THE HAUNT which did we choose? None of them! Not that we didn’t want to, mind you...but things can change in a flash. And we’ve actually done this before, switching our BIG CITY HALLOWEEN PLANS to go where nobody would expect us to. For several years, it was A NIGHTMARE ON ELM ROAD (gone now) in tiny WEBBERVILLE. We just couldn’t make it to Oakland County or even farther this Halloween...logistics and such. Where to go? It’s gotta be killer! Our “newbie” is coming this time...PAUSE: Each year we select a “newbie” to come with us to haunts. This is someone who has little or no experience with haunting. This year’s “newbie” was anxious to go on A KILLER HAYRIDE! Early season wet weather hindered plans to take the “newbie” to LENOX TWP. for HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR and SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK, and to ARMADA for BLAKE’S and SLAUGHTERED AT SUNDOWN. So off to NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD’S in YPSILANTI we went...and it was a total blast! MISSION ACCOMPLISHED. This was our 2nd time here this season! (The “newbie” couldn’t come the first time.) We hope you as much fun as we did on Halloween and during the 2018 haunt season...which, by the way...is still not over! Some haunts will be open this coming Friday & Saturday November 2 & 3 - a list will be posted later today. OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 3:45 PM - DECISIONS, DECISIONS... Time is running short, and we still haven’t been to some major haunts that we wanted to... ROTTEN MANOR blew us away every year since they opened in 2015 to become the NEWEST MEGA HAUNT IN THE DETROIT MARKET! EREBUS is legendary for good reason, but it’s been awhile since we made the pilgrimage there...and MR. HAUNTED HOUSE is a long-time pal of ours... It’s also been awhile since we made it to DARKSYDE ACRES, whose goal is to become THE WORLD’S LARGEST HAUNTED ATTRACTION. It’s ridiculously giant; they could conceivably do it. After all, “Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve!” THE HAUNT in GRAND RAPIDS has a new owner, and was strongly recommended to us by another haunt operator! OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 3 PM - THE ELLEN SHOW HALLOWEEN EPISODE is on WDIV-TV Channel 4 in Detroit right now, and then again at 4 PM on WTVG-TV Channel 13 in Toledo, Ohio. OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 2 PM - GOOD TO THE LAST DROP No, not MAXWELL HOUSE although we do have a pot of coffee brewing right now. It’s the last final stretch of the haunt season! Some are even open this coming weekend Nov. 2 & 3 that we’ll list later, but for now here’s the HAUNTS OPEN HALLOWEEN NIGHT 2018: AZRA, THE CRYPT, DARKSYDE ACRES, DERANGED, EREBUS, EXIT 13, GORE GROUNDS, THE HAUNT, THE HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME, HUSH, JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD, NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD’S, NILES SCREAM PARK, ROTTEN MANOR, THE SCREAM MACHINE, and TERRORFIED FOREST & MANOR OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 10 AM - DETROIT TRAIN DEPOT GETS HALLOWEEN MAKEOVER! You’ve probably heard that FORD MOTOR COMPANY of DEARBORN bought the old train depot building with amazing renovation plans. They had public tours to let people see the “before” and they were so popular they added extra days... Well, tonight they’re throwing a MASSIVE HALLOWEEN PARTY there including a light show and trick or treating so: They’re essentially turning this former blight into an INCREDIBLY GIANT HAUNTED HOUSE IN DETROIT! Check it out: www.detroitnews.com/story/business/autos/ford/2018/10/30/michigan-central-station-comes-alive-halloween/1823879002/ OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 9 AM - THE TODAY SHOW HALLOWEEN EDITION on NBC-TV is in its final hour right now, featuring the staff all dressed as famous people from the 80’s and lots of clever Halloween anecdotes. OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 8:30 AM - GIVING CREDIT WHERE IT’S DUE ZIOPTIS HAUNT AWARDS WILL BE PRESENTED AT THE END OF THE YEAR! And stay tuned, as there’s much more still to come. The haunt season is not over! Later today we’ll publish a list of haunts still open, including this coming weekend. OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 8:15 AM - DEVIL’S NIGHT IN THE D We hit 2 INCREDIBLE DETROIT MARKET HAUNTS last night: AWAKEN in LESLIE and JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD in JACKSON. EYE POPPING SPOOKY GOODNESS / ALL IN THE FAMILY Both haunts feature excellent 3D art sections - AWAKEN has displays by legendary 3D artist STU SMITH, and JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD has displays by the owner’s son! There’s lots more too at both haunts, and even better they’re only minutes apart from each other which made for an ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS DEVIL’S NIGHT! OCTOBER 31, 2018 WEDNESDAY 8 AM - HAPPY HALLOWEEN! A Halloween story written after visiting HAUNTED HYDRO in OHIO now appears at the top of the page in “News.” OCTOBER 30 2018 TUESDAY 12 NOON - What better way to spend DEVIL’S NIGHT than at a haunted house? Here’s the haunts open tonight: AWAKEN, AZRA, THE CRYPT, DERANGED, EREBUS, EXIT 13, GORE GROUNDS, THE HAUNT, HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR, THE HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME, HUSH, JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD, PHANTOM FOREST HAYRIDE, ROTTEN MANOR, THE SCREAM MACHINE, and TERRORFIED FOREST & MANOR OCTOBER 30, 2018 TUESDAY 2:30 AM - $100 TO GET IN, BUT YOUR MONEY BACK IF YOU MAKE IT ALL THE WAY THROUGH! Yeah, right. Have you ever heard something like this about a mystery haunt? It’s total baloney, and here’s a popular prior posting that may ring a bell: OCTOBER 27, 2015 TUESDAY 1 AM - DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THIS ONE HAUNTED HOUSE WHERE_____________________________? (fill in the blank) Ever play the "Telephone Game," where a circle of people whispers a "secret" to each other one at a time until it goes all the way around? The first person writes the "secret" down, and compares it to what the final person says. It's NEVER the same, and the results can be hilarious. Now, imagine a "Telephone Game" where the "secret" is about an outrageous haunted house where all sorts of disgusting stuff is going on. So every year there's FAKE HAUNT STORIES that are stretched to new dimensions of absurdity with every re-telling. Multiply this concept by several thousand or so, and you've got this ever evolving story about an illusive HAUNT FROM BEYOND THAT DOESN'T EVEN EXIST, yet lives a life that cannot die! The details vary widely, but there's always one thing in common with all of these amazing stories - nobody can ever tell you exactly where the haunt is. Why? It's simple. It's only an urban legend. But in peoples' minds...ah, that's a whole different animal. There, it mutates itself and slays even the most rugged He-Man that eats pit bulls for breakfast. As far as we know, the first version of this story goes something like this: "There's a haunt that costs $100 to get in, but there's 10 rooms and you get back $10 for every room you make it thru. But unspeakable things happen there, and three people already went insane. In fact, NOBODY has made it past the third room! It's put on by a frat house in Ann Arbor that got banned and kicked out of U of M. The crazy haunt from hell includes renegade Medical Students who got booted from U of M MED SCHOOL for stealing body parts from cadavers! They performed hideous experiments, and decided to see what they could get away with before being shut down by the Police. The first room is filled with 6 inches of water, and you must remove your shoes and socks. (They do promise to return them later when you exit.)There are hundreds of snakes slithering around your feet and in between your toes, but all non-poisonous so they can't get sued. The second room is totally pitch black. As you make your way to a hallway end, you feel gooey slimy stuff on the wall. It's human remains, mixed in with turkey guts to completely fill the wall. You get blood all over your clothes. It smells like death, and everybody gags and throws up. The third room is only 25 feet square, but has 500 live rats. You still have no shoes or socks, so they go to town on your feet and ankles. But to avoid lawsuits all the rats have been de-teethed so you don't actually get bit, just gummed." (end of FICTIONAL story - do NOT repeat this to anyone!) SEPTEMBER 28, 2019 SATURDAY 4 PM - MASSES DESCEND INTO MADNESS We just got back from the HAUNTED GARAGE SALE, sponsored by the Motor City Haunt Club and it was a giant success! We immediately saw someone we know, GW from HAUNTED GARAGE PRODUCTIONS in GROSSE POINTE FARMS. And the wristbands have their name on them, which we didn’t notice until after leaving... There was an amazing variety of haunt related things for sale, including lots of original artwork. One of our favorites was the DISTURBED DOLLZ collection from an artist named Cheryl. We took lots of pictures with a NIKON DSLR, and will be posting them soon on our Flickr photostream. Now time for a short rest before heading out for a wild Saturday night, with BONADEO FARMS and ROTTEN MANOR. We can’t wait! SEPTEMBER 28, 2019 SATURDAY 7 AM - “...HERE I COME TO SAVE THE DAY!” ( NO, NOT MIGHTY MOUSE) When your plans don’t work out, you need a “PLAN B.” But if even that doesn’t work out, it’s fabulous if there’s something else you can always fall back on that never lets you down. And so it was last night. We hit HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME in INKSTER, and got a primo dose of Old School that turned out to be just what the doctor ordered! The “What’s next” section is a wish list of sorts actually... At the bottom of the current list is the haunt we’re actually most anxious to see ASAP this season. WHO’S ON FIRST “I don’t wanna click there...WHICH HAUNT, WHICH HAUNT?” THE HAUNT. “No, WHICH haunt?” THE HAUNT. “The one where you get your money back if you make it all the way through?” No, that one is fake news. THE HAUNT. “The one with the Guinness World Record?” No, THE HAUNT. “Oh! The one put on by the Frat House that got kicked out of U of M Med School?” No, that one is fake news too...the real one is THE HAUNT. “But WHERE is it?” Now we’re getting somewhere. It’s in Grand Rapids. “But isn’t DETROIT THE HAUNTED HOUSE CAPITAL OF THE WORLD?” Yes, absolutely. But the world is shrinking every day, and gravity is proof that it sucks too. That’s why your plans don’t always work out. THE BIG STORY WE WERE FORCED TO DISREGARD It actually started a couple years ago, after JB finished an amazing run at THE HAUNT...yup that’s the full name of the place...in GRAND RAPIDS. This was a haunt that had 35,000 people go through in their first year! But nothing lasts forever, and the lease finally ran out at the Waldorf building. We were there for JB’S Swan Song, and it was bittersweet... JB, who was always totally cool and forthcoming, didn’t say what was to become of his incredible creation he was clever enough to call just “THE HAUNT” and we didn’t ask. The silence was deafening. What would happen? TA DAH! DS took over at a new location and everybody, including other haunt operators, told us it takes things to a whole new level when it comes to haunted attractions! JB’S LEGACY LIVES ON. We couldn’t make it to THE HAUNT last year which was the first time at the new location, so we’re determined to get there this season. Thinking back...it was actually THE SCREAM MACHINE in TAYLOR that was the first one to tell us we had to see THE HAUNT in GRAND RAPIDS... COMING AROUND FULL CIRCLE And then this season... Before leaving THE SCREAM MACHINE in TAYLOR recently, we mentioned to the operator that we were going to ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY. With a big smile, she said it’s a favorite haunt of hers! How could she know that? They have a system where I think it’s 11 haunts get to visit each other, and that’s how she was able to go to ROTTEN MANOR. Signing off for now...see you at the HAUNTED GARAGE SALE later today! SEPTEMBER 27, 2019 FRIDAY 4:30 PM - A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS We sadly missed ROTTEN MANOR last year, but in 2017 we went and took a few pictures after going through the haunt. Those pictures are now posted on our Flickr photostream: www.flickr.com/photos/45316911@N03/ Also, other haunted attraction pictures can be found by clicking on “Albums” and then on “Haunted Attraction Stuff.” SEPTEMBER 27, 2019 FRIDAY 2 PM - RAINING ON OUR PARADE, ALREADY Rats! Rain is forecast with 80% probability tonight for the White lake area where BONADEO FARMS is, and half of it is outdoors. Also half outdoors is ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY, also in Oakland County... Last year, rain thwarted our plans to hit HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR and SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK both in LENOX TWP... Tonight is opening night at the new location of HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION in WESTLAND. But this is really important, and we always try NOT to go on opening night for key haunts... Not only is HUSH at a new, much larger location this year but THE SCREAM QUEEN* herself is on board there this year... In past years in this situation we’d just go to the FLINT AREA. But alas, CLIO MANOR HAUNTED HOUSE, ST. LUCIFER’S and THE CRYPT are not open this year. EXIT 13 is open this year, and they blew us away last year... AZRA CHAMBER OF HORRORS HH in MADISON HEIGHTS is indoors and open tonight, but the plan is to hit HAUNTED GARAGE PRODUCTIONS in GROSSE POINTE WOODS which is mostly outdoors on the same night as AZRA... Decisions, decisions! * = For those not familiar with the Detroit haunt hierarchy, there’s two major players. MR. HAUNTED HOUSE started THE FEAR FINDER and THE SCREAM QUEEN helped start THE HAUNT GUIDE along with KW and serves as consultant for many haunts. SEPTEMBER 27, 2019 FRIDAY 4:30 AM - ‘O PUMPKIN ON HIGH! Talking with my partner earlier...we both feel the call of the SKY HIGH PUMPKIN at SHAWHAVEN HAUNTED FARM in MASON. They have a pumpkin WAY UP HIGH mounted on a super tall pole...IT’S WAY COOL JUNIOR! www.shawhavenhauntedfarm.com We also lamented it’s been too long since we hit TERROR ON 27 in ASHLEY. www.terroron27.com TERROR ON 27 doesn’t open until October 4th this year, so there’s plenty of time to plan a journey. They have a killer sound system that hits you the moment you arrive...quad attraction haunt...the food was awesome....gotta get back there hopefully this season! They always blew us away with original story lines and unusual approachs...one time they put a spin on interaction with a challenge between you and just one monster that essentially you end up playing hide-and-seek with...never seen this before... Another fave from TERROR ON 27 was the ultra dainty manicure with a really BAD ASS MOTORCYCLE DUDE...fabulous! Or how about this wild premise from a part of the now defunct TERRORTOWN in TOLEDO, OHIO at Lucas County Fairgrounds (we always got lost trying to find the elusive Key Street...GPS didn’t exist yet). One member of your group is selected to carry a special electric lantern. It supplies the ONLY light during the journey. There’s no strobes, blacklights, lasers...NOTHING. You must trust your lantern to help find your way through a very dark pathway. But then it flickers and then dies out...then it strobes...goes out again, comes back on... Turns out the lantern is REMOTE CONTROLLED BY THE MONSTERS. They see you coming, wearing night vision equipment...and toy with you mercilessly! SEPTEMBER 27, 2019 FRIDAY 3 AM - CALLING ALL HAUNTS! (AND YARD HAUNT ENTHUSIASTS) THE HAUNTED GARAGE SALE, sponsored by the MOTOR CITY HAUNT CLUB is coming up on Saturday, Sept. 28 from 9AM - 3PM in DEARBORN at the FORD COMMUNITY PERFORMING ARTS CENTER. www.motorcityhauntclub.com Here’s your chance to grab a great deal on quality haunt gear, without paying SCARE FACTORY prices! It’s only $4 to get in for adults and free for kids under 14. Perhaps you’re a haunt looking for a new gag or a yard haunt fanatic looking to WOW the neighborhood. Or even just a haunt fan, like most of you reading this right now. Here’s your chance to hobnob with haunt royalty! ;) And yes, we’ll be there too. Hey, why not meet us there? We’ll be the ones right in the middle of hundreds of wild and crazy haunters! (According to their Facebook page, there’s 760 people going, and 4.7K are interested.) SEPTEMBER 26, 2019 THURSDAY 4 AM - NEW BLOOD Here’s a new outdoors haunt, GHOSTLY GROVE in PINCKNEY. www.ghostlygrove.com This haunt is on the site of the SCHELL FAMILY FARM, and they’ve hired professional set designers for this first time effort. We welcome them to the vibrant Michigan Haunt Community! Pinckney is right next to Hell, what better place for a brand spanking new haunt?! ;) SEPTEMBER 25, 2019 WEDNESDAY 11 PM - NO BEANS SPILLED BEFORE THEIR TIME Flipping through the FEAR FINDER and THE HAUNT GUIDE...both are looking cool...and now we can mention something we’ve been anxious to talk about. Often, we’re privy to what haunts are planning for the following season. Haunt operators know they can bounce ideas off us without it getting out ahead of time... Well, here’s the BIG NEWS FOR 2019 we’ve been anxious to announce (and you may already know if you looked at THE HAUNT GUIDE): HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION has expanded, in fact it’s SIX TIMES BIGGER than before! They’re still in Westland, but moved from Ford Road to Cherry Hill at the site of the former SKATELAND. They did an amazing job with a much smaller space, so we can’t wait to see what they’re up to now where they can stretch their chops out big time! SEPTEMBER 22, 2019 SUNDAY 10 AM - There’s some glitches that need to be fixed after switching to a newer version of our website program. The text on the left in the tabs is hard to see, and in Reviews the blue tabs appearing on the right aren’t working. Until they’re fixed, please select from the tabs on the left on the Reviews page. Also, the pumpkin graphic on the main page is missing. We’ll be seeing the webmaster soon... SEPTEMBER 22, 2019 SUNDAY 7 AM - THE MADNESS BEGINS! Like anxious kids on Christmas Eve, we’re always trying to get to haunts as soon as possible in the season... For years we went to ST. LUCIFER’S HAUNTED ASYLUM for our first haunt of the year...and who remembers the HAUNTED TRAIL PROJECT that used to be across the street? Sadly, we won’t be going to ST. LUCIFER’S this year because it’s again closed for the season. But we might see them again, as we heard a new location was in the works... So where to go instead? Someplace we’ve been to a lot...it’s gotta be killer...time for a road trip to Jackson for JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD! “High Ho Hi Ho, to Jackson We Must Go...” (sung poorly) We’ve been to JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD for TEN YEARS IN A ROW NOW, they must be doing something right! It’s not too far from Detroit...the natural amazing ambiance of the place with the massive 150,000 square feet building just makes you FEEL LIKE HALLOWEEN...right now! Then on Saturday night, we couldn’t wait to experience ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY which many now regard as DETROIT’S NEW PREMIERE MEGAHAUNT. But wouldn’t you know it...RATS! Turns out I-75 is closed between 696 and Square Lake until Monday morning...and that’s how Mandy* says we need to go... PLAN B TO THE RESCUE Where else can we go? Someplace we’ve been to a lot...it’s gotta be killer...time for a road trip to TAYLOR for THE SCREAM MACHINE! NECESSITY IS THE MOTHER OF FORCED REINVENTION Huh? After the season is over, they have to move everything out of the building. So THE SCREAM MACHINE is literally disassembled every year, even as they remain at their ECORSE ROAD location which is only seconds off of TELEGRAPH ROAD (the Main Drag of the area). What better way to reinvent yourself? And so it is, and THE SCREAM MACHINE is again way different from last year! Even better, the HANDS DOWN BEST GAG this year is totally new and will positively KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF! We’re not about to say exactly what it is, but you will know it when you see it. We will tell you this much: A PINT SIZED ACTOR IS GONNA BLOW YOUR MIND! That’s not just us saying that either...a group of 5 girls ahead of us were SO FREAKED OUT they would NOT continue...they latched onto us and we eventually went past them... Wow, what a GREAT SATURDAY NIGHT we had...THANK YOU SCREAM MACHINE! * = “Mandy” is the girl inside our GPS unit, she speaks so beautifully saying things like “Turn right, and take the motorway.” SEPTEMBER 20, 2019 FRIDAY 1 PM - IF IT AIN’T BROKEN... There’s been a push by the Halloween & Costume Association on www.change.org to change the date that Halloween is celebrated from October 31st to the last Saturday of the month. Say what?! Why would they do that? The main reason is that supposedly it would be safer for the kids during Trick-or-Treating. Also, it would be better for the bars. As to the safety of the kids, we say NO it would not be safer...in fact it could end up being less safe. Saturday night is NOT a school night, which means they’d probably be out later than on the 31st which most often is on a school night. This year the 31st will be Thursday, for example. As to what’s best for the bars, we say WHO CARES? Halloween is more for kids than them! Either way, the bars will find a way to have a Halloween theme party. We just checked their website, and how about that there’s also now petitions to KEEP the date of October 31st! www.change.org/search?q=halloween Don’t mess with tradition! SEPTEMBER 20, 2019 FRIDAY 11 AM - GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES! We’re off and running, starting off another fabulous haunt season this weekend at two of MICHIGAN’S PREMIER MEGA HAUNTS: JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD in JACKSON and ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY. We sadly missed ROTTEN MANOR last year, so that’s a priority. This is the haunt that many regard as the NEW PREMIER MEGA HAUNT for the Detroit market! SEPTEMBER 13, 2019 FRIDAY 9 PM - HOLLYWOOD COMES TO HOLLY, SORTA ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY is open tonight! www.RottenManor.com Even if you went last year, you’ll want to go again in 2019 because about half of the now defunct BRANDYWYNE CEMETERY is now part of the show at ROTTEN MANOR! Wow, how did they swing that? Never mind that...but here’s another insider tidbit for you: The other half of BRANDYWYNE went to HAUNTED GARAGE PRODUCTIONS in GROSSE POINTE WOODS. BRANDYWYNE CEMETERY was created by a former DISNEY ARTIST, and is a one-of-a-kind masterpiece! SEPTEMBER 13, 2019 FRIDAY 8 PM - DOUBLING DOWN No, not The Donald. It’s the moon & the date. Huh? Read on... Happy Friday The 13th! And HAPPY FULL MOON FRIDAY too. Tonight is a full moon, but it’s also the MICROMOON. What the heck is that? Basically, it shrinks. Okay, it just looks that way because it’s even more way out than usual! Huh? These guys can explain it better: www.livescience.com/friday-the-13th-micromoon.html JULY 13, 2019 SATURDAY 12 NOON - HOT FUN IN THE SUMMERTIME GODSMACK returns to where they shot their “Awake” video this weekend, the OHIO STATE REFORMATORY in MANSFIELD! It’s all part of the INKCARCERATION FESTIVAL along with SHINEDOWN and many other awesome rock bands. THE BLOOD PRISON HAUNTED HOUSE will be open too! Details: www.cleveland.com/entertainment/2019/01/inkcarceration-announces-2019-lineup-shinedown-godsmack-more.html Closer to home, today is the WAYNE COUNTY PARKS FAMILY FUNFEST at Nankin Mills Park off Hines Drive in Westland with live music, rides, etc. Details: www.nankinmills.org MARCH 17, 2019 SUNDAY 12:15 AM - HAPPY ST. PATTY’S DAY! JANUARY 5, 2019 SATURDAY 3 PM - WE SALUTE YOU! We’d like to congratulate all haunt operators, whether or not an award was received. All of you were up to the challenge of providing that unique form of entertainment that kids of all ages have come to love, HAUNTING! Your creativity and imagination never cease to amaze us, and you enrich our lives with wacky craziness that takes us to another world... One that is always lurking in the recesses of our minds, waiting, waiting...until next Fall when the monsters jump into action again! DECEMBER 31, 2018 MONDAY 6 AM - AWARDS NOW POSTED Click on Awards to the left. Also now posted in News: THE ZIOPTIS 2018 STATE OF THE INDUSTRY ADDRESS DECEMBER 30, 2018 SUNDAY 3 PM - THE BIG PICTURE In addition to the awards, we will also be posting: THE ZIOPTIS 2018 STATE OF THE INDUSTRY ADDRESS DECEMBER 30, 2018 SUNDAY 5 AM - ALL WILL BE REVEALED... The categories are now listed for the ZIOPTIS HAUNT AWARDS 2018, and tomorrow the winners will be announced! (Click on Awards.) DECEMBER 29, 2018 SATURDAY 7 PM - A WORD ABOUT THE UPCOMING AWARDS We debated long and hard about whether we should give awards this year, after having missed some major haunts that probably would’ve won some of them. Because of this, there will NOT be an overall best haunt of the year award! Instead, the awards will highlight specific noteworthy achievements and are not meant to compare haunts. (We did away with our original 5 STAR RATING scale in 2009, which became counterproductive to our purpose of promoting the entire haunt scene.) DECEMBER 13, 2018 THURSDAY 2 PM - MAKING A LIST & CHECKING IT TWICE We’re in the process of deciding on awards for 2018 that will be announced at the end of the year. Besides reviewing the recordings and notes, we’ll be calling select haunts to check on various things...names of certain characters, gags and such... So if you’re a haunt operator and get a phone call from us, it’s a good thing! DECEMBER 2, 2018 SUNDAY 2:30 PM - Just added: a NON REVIEW of ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY. Huh? See Reviews 2018_A. Sorry, the right side tabs are still not enabled for Reviews...please click on the left section to find various years. DECEMBER 1, 2018 SATURDAY 1 PM - RAINING ON OUR PARADE Today is the CHRISTMAS IN IDA FESTIVAL which we’ve mentioned in past years. www.ChristmasInIda.com It’s a lot of fun, and a chance to go to an event the likes of which is usually available only during summer. There’s a FREE COUNTRY CONCERT followed by fireworks and a massive parade. This year the concert is by Michigan native JOSH GRACIN, who got his start on AMERICAN IDOL. Unfortunately, the weather is not cooperating this year and rain is in the forecast... But the show will go on. I talked to festival director Dale Zorn, who said nothing short of a tornado would make them cancel! We decided to skip it this year, but still encourage you to go if you don’t mind carrying an umbrella. One of the silly highlights is HOLIDAY HOUNDS ON PARADE, featuring dogs dressed in holiday garb...GREAT STUFF! This is the biggest event of the year for this small town, with over 50,000 people attending! Be sure to tune in again at the end of the year for the 2018 ZIOPTIS HAUNT AWARDS. OCTOBER 6, 2019 SUNDAY 6 PM - SUNDAY FUN DAY! There’s plenty of great haunts open tonight: BLAKE’S HAUNTED BIG APPLE in ARMADA, DECADES OF THE DEAD in YALE, EREBUS in PONTIAC, EXIT 13 in MT. MORRIS, FACTORY OF THE DEAD in SAGINAW, THE HAUNT in GRAND RAPIDS, HUSH HAUNT in WESTLAND, JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD in JACKSON, NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD’S in YPSILANTI, PURGATORY in WYANDOTTE, ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY, SCREAM PARK in NILES and TERRORFIED FOREST in PINCKNEY. OCTOBER 6, 2019 SUNDAY 3 PM - IT’S ALIVE! And kicking too...THE DETROIT HAUNT SCENE IS KILLING IT BIG TIME, if what we saw last night is any indication. Although it’s early in the season, the lines of happy haunters were long and strong at HUSH HAUNT in WESTLAND and THE SCREAM MACHINE in TAYLOR. We hit DERANGED in ROMULUS right at opening, so the line was just starting to grow. We predict a successful run for them! OCTOBER 6, 2019 SUNDAY 3 AM - DETROIT STRONG, WORLD CLASS We hit 3 of the 9 Detroit area haunts Saturday night.* To our knowledge, 9 is the most haunts in any county/municipality on the planet which goes to show that indeed DETROIT IS THE WORLD CAPITAL OF HAUNTED HOUSES! (Detroit is in Wayne County, so any haunts in Wayne County can be considered DETROIT AREA.) First stop was at DERANGED HAUNT in ROMULUS. It’s only their 2nd year, and they’ve already expanded and improved the show. And we heard the MOST AMAZING WHOOSHING SOUND we’ve ever heard at any haunt here...a few times actually. WHOA NELLIE, what kind of monstrous sound system do they have? IT’S NOT JBL OR KLIPSCH. IT’S REAL. The haunt is in a bona fide forest, but it’s also in ROMULUS where WAYNE COUNTY AIRPORT is. These are REAL JET PLANES doing a fly-by of sorts, and the result is breathtaking! Even better, there was little wind and the resulting cloud of fog rising added a spooky ambiance that can not be achieved at an indoor haunt. Not too shabby for just the first stop in a DETROIT TRIFECTA OF TERROR! Next up was HUSH HAUNT in WESTLAND. WOWSER, BIG TIME. This place is incredible! It’s like a mansion...wait a second, it is a mansion...for real. Huh? Those walls...they’re not props made for set...they’re real. The exquisite stained glass...is real. The antique furniture...is real. It looks and feels old, because it is old. There’s many amazing stories all connected to these items...for real. Say what?! The Cliff Notes version of what happened since last year with HUSH goes something like this: Owner operator CB somehow found estate sales at some amazing genuine mansions, and bought everything lock stock and barrel. Then he reassembled the mansions, and a lot more inside the new building they constructed at the new property. Of course such a monumental task could not be accomplished without assistance, so he reached out to the SCREAM QUEEN who many consider to be the premiere haunt consultant/designer in the industry. To give perspective, SCREAM QUEEN has also played key roles in the creation of other WORLD CLASS HAUNTS such as THE HAUNT in GRAND RAPIDS, ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY, SCREAM PARK in NILES and many more. Our last haunt for Saturday was THE SCREAM MACHINE in TAYLOR. “Wait a second Zioptis...didn’t you already go there?” Yup. LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT / GOOD THINGS COME IN SMALL PACKAGES “Why did you go back?” Thing is, we fell in love. We had to go back. In a genius casting move, THE SCREAM MACHINE features an unforgettable pint-sized actor that has been WOWING the crowds big time. This visually striking image is so strangely compelling...you have no choice but to submit! The only way you could have prevented it is if you had not seen it. ;) All gushing aside, of course it takes more than one stellar performer to carry a haunt. The SCREAM MACHINE actors were spot on throughout, with excellent delivery and interaction. When we got there we watched with glee as happy haunters were being jettisoned out of the MIGHTY SCREAM MACHINE. We did ask a few what they thought at the exit, but really just their faces said it all in an instant. That certain exhilaration... the sheer excitement... THAT’S HAUNTING MOTOR CITY MADNESS STYLE! * The 9 haunts in Wayne County are: 1. DERANGED, ROMULUS 2. HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME, INKSTER 3. HAUNTED GARAGE PRODUCTIONS, GROSSE POINTE WOODS 4. HUSH HAUNT, WESTLAND 5. PHANTOM FOREST HAYRIDE, GROSSE ILE 6. PUMPKIN FACTORY, BELLEVILLE (western edge of Wayne County) 7. PURGATORY, WYANDOTTE 8. THE SCREAM MACHINE, TAYLOR 9. WOODS OF DARKNESS in SOUTH ROCKWOOD OCTOBER 5, 2019 SATURDAY 3:30 PM - OVERCHOICE HITS DETROIT HAUNT SCENE A book from 1970 called FUTURE SHOCK by Alvin Toffler predicted the predicament we find ourselves in right now. Huh? Toffler warned of someday having so many choices about things available that just making that choice could be bewildering. And so it is today. Here it is...SATURDAY NIGHT and the weather is perfect...where do we go? SHAWHAVEN FARMS in MASON and BESTMAZE in WILLIAMSTON? SLAUGHTERHOUSE in FOWLERVILLE and the brand new GHOSTLY GROVE in PINCKNEY literally right next door to Hell? HUSH HAUNT in WESTLAND and DERANGED in ROMULUS? We already went to THE SCREAM MACHINE in TAYLOR, but if we get started early enough we could hit them again... HUSH has expanded by a factor of 6, with their brand new location at the site of the former SKATELAND WEST on CHERRY HILL. DERANGED is in the 2nd year, and won a ZIOPTIS AWARD to boot... Oh yeah, last year HUSH WON 3 ZIOPTIS AWARDS! Decisions, decisions...what a nice problem to have... OCTOBER 5, 2019 SATURDAY 1 PM - AMAZING ARMADA As small towns go, Armada is a giant in the haunt world! They have TWO excellent haunts, and we’re reminded of when for example, a Burger King moves in next door to a Wendy’s... Theoretically they’re competitors, but they end up being allies because they bring more total business of that kind to the area. We started our Friday night in Armada getting slaughtered at sundown at SLAUGHTERED AT SUNDOWN, as we saw firsthand why this haunt has been so successful for so many years. Then we went to one of the two BLAKE’S in Armada. Huh? Besides BLAKE’S HAUNTED BIG APPLE on North Avenue, Blake’s also has another giant facility with a fabulous restaurant on Armada Center Road, BLAKE’S ORCHARD. Finally, we made our way to BLAKE’S HAUNTED BIG APPLE which was totally off-the-hook! They have a walk through HAUNTED BARN, their famous HAYRIDE, 2 mazes, cool photo ops, an incredible store, karaoke, and lots more. The karaoke boasts high quality sound & lights... One song we heard was “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey, and the entire audience joined in with great enthusiasm when the lyrics got to the line “Born and raised in SOUTH DETROIT!” Amenities are second to none at BLAKE’S HAUNTED BIG APPLE, with a small army of employees roaming the grounds and a stand alone bathroom building the gals are sure to appreciate! The hayride at BLAKE’S was totally different from our last visit, except for the halfway stop where the friendly witches serve everyone cider & donuts to die for. Yum! Our only regret Friday night was that we didn’t get a chance to sneak in a 3rd haunt by driving only 10 miles from Armada to Lenox Twp... Just like Armada, Lenox Twp. ALSO has 2 fabulous haunts! HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR and SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK are BOTH in Lenox Twp. Even better, they both have killer hayrides as well as walk through haunts. Decisions, decisions... OCTOBER 4, 2019 FRIDAY 12 NOON - FAREWELL DEAR FRIENDS Every year, haunts come and go. It’s just the nature of the beast. This time, it’s KRAZY HILDA’S in YPSILANTI and REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS in ROMULUS that are missing in action. KRAZY HILDA’S website still says they’re not operating in 2018 and they’ll be back in 2019, but there’s no ad in the haunt rags and their phone # is out of service. REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS is a different story. The HURON TURKEY FARM where it’s located answered their phone promptly, and said the haunt is gone but that it may be converted into a fun house starting next year. HURON TURKEY FARM remains open for business, and is going strong as a prime family friendly destination. Their front building still has tasty treats and is decked out even more than before. OCTOBER 2, 2019 WEDNESDAY 6 PM - FALL IS HERE, LET THE HAYRIDES BEGIN! The weather is looking great for this weekend, and that means HAYRIDES! We have SO many fabulous hayrides in Michigan. Just a few faves: SLAUGHTERHOUSE in FOWLERVILLE was created by magicians and comedians, HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR in LENOX TWP. has one-of-a-kind giant monsters to freak you out, BLAKE’S BIG APPLE in ARMADA has grandiose gags that will knock your socks off, SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK in LENOX TWP. has an amazing story teller and a swamp that swallows you up...WIARD’S NIGHT TERRORS in YPSILANTI designs their own amazing props/gags...and the list goes on and on... SEPTEMBER 29, 2019 SUNDAY 2 PM - GERMAN FAIRY TALE COMES ALIVE IN FOREST! The Brothers Grimm would be proud. ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY has a new GINGERBREAD HOUSE that is to die for...literally, if the wackos inside it have their way. It’s part of the new forest experience this year at ROTTEN MANOR, complete with a pathway of giant lollipops and a special meat smoker the occupants are eager to fire up...just for you! We barely recognized ROTTEN MANOR since our last visit in 2017! So much has been added to what was already a bona fide Mega Haunt, it’s mind boggling. Full review coming, but here’s just a few highlights of ROTTEN MANOR for 2019: First of all, it’s the actors. Actors can make or break ANY haunt, regardless of how many amazing props and special effects they have... Right from the get-go, they were absolutely fabulous! The ticket taker Patricia Jake (common name Joe Leonard) has silly tricks up her sleeve, and the first room greeter is remarkable. He delivers a strange rhyming story as premise for the haunt. He is SO good he could be a SAG/AFTRA VO dude! haha Another new feature this year is the EXTREME 3D VORTEX, which takes the classic BlackHole effect to a new dimension with an optical illusion we’ve never seen before with this gag. Even the amenities have been revamped, as with the gourmet food truck offering tasty Latin Street Food with plenty of healthy choices. One of our faves was the side dish of smoked squash & corn. Yum! Our apologies to BONADEO FARMS for missing them last night. We were at ROTTEN MANOR for about 4 hours, and still didn’t get to do everything! OCTOBER 13, 2019 SUNDAY 10 PM - ANY WAY YOU WANT IT We saw two completely different haunts Saturday night, but we loved them both. First we hit the wild and crazy AZRA CHAMBER OF HORRORS HAUNTED HOUSE in MADISON HEIGHTS which has expanded inside and out since their debut last year. Outside, they essentially converted the waiting area into a DANCE PARTY CLUB complete with a DJ, club lighting, and a PARTYMASTER DUDE that reminded us of REDFOO. They even played the song “Party Rock,” which REDFOO did with his band LMFAO. It gets better. The entire area is now covered and heated, and the sound system is PRO AUDIO with massive subwoofers for body thumping bass. Inside, the haunt has expanded by about 1/3 from last year with 2 new areas and special emphasis on the CLOWN ROOM upstairs which has doubled in size. Then we hit the magical wonderland that is HAUNTED GARAGE PRODUCTIONS in GROSSE POINTE FARMS. They’ve expanded too, and take you to so many different places -- even other planets -- that your head will spin! The actors are supplemented by a dizzying array of animatronics the likes of which we’ve never seen at a single haunt before. One feature at HAUNTED GARAGE that drove my partner wild had nothing to do with the impressive scenes. It was the aroma of FRESH DONUTS being made. The combo of a donut and cider is irresistible! Our apologies to THE HAUNTED FOREST in ROCHESTER for missing them. It’s located at a zip line adventure park, which reminds us of a haunt we went to in FRANKENMUTH a few years ago also at a zip line park. OCTOBER 13, 2019 SUNDAY 7 PM - WILD AND CRAZY / FANTASY WONDERLAND Our WISCONSIN GUEST has gone now, off to a big IT CONFERENCE in CHICAGO that starts tomorrow. Sadly, he wasn’t able to join us for haunting last night... But we had a blast, visiting two TOP NOTCH HAUNTS as different as night and day, AZRA CHAMBER OF HORRORS HAUNTED HOUSE in MADISON HEIGHTS and HAUNTED GARAGE PRODUCTIONS in GROSSE POINTE FARMS. OCTOBER 13, 2019 SUNDAY 6:30 PM - SUNDAY FUN DAY! There’s plenty of great haunts open tonight: BLAKE’S HAUNTED BIG APPLE in ARMADA, DECADES OF THE DEAD in YALE, EREBUS in PONTIAC, EXIT 13 in MT. MORRIS, FACTORY OF THE DEAD in SAGINAW, THE HAUNT in GRAND RAPIDS, HUSH HAUNT in WESTLAND, JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD in JACKSON, NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD’S in YPSILANTI, PURGATORY in WYANDOTTE, ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY, SCREAM PARK in NILES and TERRORFIED FOREST in PINCKNEY. OCTOBER 13, 2019 SUNDAY 6 PM - A PICKLE OF A MESS OMG! You won’t believe what just happened, right while talking to my partner by phone. And it all goes back to a jar of pickles I bought last week at Kroger, and a new car good luck charm my partner’s friend gave her long go. Huh? Stand by my little monkeys... OCTOBER 12, 2019 SATURDAY 4 PM - DAIRY LAND DAYDREAMING Visiting with our WISCONSIN GUEST right now, watching some LaserFace... Wisconsin does have many wild haunts...but we know that DETROIT TOTALLY ROCKS THE HAUNT SCENE and we’re gonna have a great time tonight! We’re hitting two haunts that WON ZIOPTIS AWARDS last year, AZRA in MADISON HEIGHTS and HAUNTED GARAGE in GROSSE POINTE WOODS. And we hope to also check out the new HAUNTED FOREST in ROCHESTER if time allows... Laser lighting has become part of many haunts, and we sure do LOVE a good LIQUID SKY room! In case you don’t know, the LIQUID SKY effect is created with fog and a laser projector facing towards you from the opposite end of a room. The beams turn 3D in midair. The beams can dance around, or stay in a fixed oval pattern. When an oval pattern is used, it created a tunnel effect. You can clearly see the edges of the laser in the fog, and if you drag your fingers through at the edge you can actually see the air currents being produced! Even better is when a fan is placed behind the laser to suck air towards it, creating a spinning tunnel that seems to draw you in. THE HAUNTING in ADRIAN was the first to feature this effect to our knowledge many moons ago using a fixed beam oval green laser. It was a jaw dropper - people had never seen this before! Lasers have come a long way since then, check THIS out from LaserFace: www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtXx3Oubmy Rats, that link isn’t working but it still takes you to YouTube. Copy the following and paste into the search bar: Laserface by Gareth Emery / Seattle WaMu 2019 (Full Set LIVE) and prepare to be amazed! OCTOBER 12, 2019 SATURDAY 3:30 AM - Finally! A new tab has been added for 2019 Reviews. Please note: after clicking on Reviews you’ll need to select from the list of years on the left of the page. And sorry for the hard to read print in the tabs with similar colors; hope to get it changed soon and to get our GREAT PUMPKIN back too! Also, What’s Next just updated. OCTOBER 12, 2019 SATURDAY 3 AM - BRAND NEW SHINY We took the night off Friday after various delays, one of which was totally worth it. It was at the car dealer of all places, and HOORAY we now have a brand new ride for our haunt journeys! A FORD EDGE will take over the MAGIC BUS status that previously went to our TOWN & COUNTRY VAN. The van died a horrible death. It was ugly. It was a mass of twisted hideousness. And now it lies in the graveyard for motorized monstrosities, all alone with nobody to talk to. BTW, you may have heard that FORD is also an acronym. Just in case you didn’t know, F.O.R.D. stands for “First On Race Day.” OCTOBER 11, 2019 FRIDAY 3 PM - MOTHER NATURE’S MONKEY WRENCH DOUBLE RATS! All week we’ve been anxious for Friday night to hit more of our favorite outdoor haunts. HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR and SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK was the plan, but the weather forecast for tonight in LENOX TWP. is rain at a whopping 90%. They might be open “Rain or Shine”...we’re not sure...okay, what’s PLAN B? And then there’s our WISCONSIN GUEST...will he arrive soon enough to go? Last time we had an out of town guest it was someone from New York, and we took him to HUSH HAUNT in WESTLAND and KRAZY HILDA’S in YPSILANTI... Boo hoo! KRAZY HILDA’S is not open this year. One thing we totally loved about KRAZY HILDA’S was the ambiance and feel of ACTUALLY BEING OUTSIDE for a haunted experience. The possibilities in a forest are limited only by the imagination, and of course the ability to pull it off. KRAZY HILDA’S PA was killer, and their one-of-a-kind ghoul dollies are family heirlooms. They made full use of the forest’s advantages with giant scale gags/doors and strategically placed monster hiding spots. We miss them so, PLEASE COME BACK NICOLE! HUSH HAUNT is indoors, and so is THE SCREAM MACHINE in TAYLOR so rain can’t interfere with the show. This would be our 2nd visit to HUSH, and our third to THE SCREAM MACHINE! HUSH is worth going to twice, as the attention to detail and just the shear amount of stuff going on now brings them to BONA FIDE MEGA HAUNT status. It’s hard to absorb that much in a single visit, which reminds me... I don’t care how big and bad you are, every haunt has its’ strengths and also weaknesses. Last year, the major weakness that HUSH suffered was a short show length. The Ford Road location building was tiny compared to what they have now *, and still they won THREE ZIOPTIS AWARDS IN 2018! * = The new HUSH facility is 40,000 square feet! OCTOBER 11, 2019 FRIDAY 4:30 AM - BUCKEYE SIGN OFF We heard that THE HAUNTED HYDRO in FREMONT, OHIO is in their last year. Boo hoo! CRAZY BOB is the genius behind this amazing haunt, made from an out of commission hydro electric plant. www.thehauntedhydro.com Part carnival, part fantasy story land, this haunt is always a total blast! We really love the bigger than life books here, and the monolithic towers have been known to erupt with giant fire blasts. And not much further away is the amazing GHOSTLY MANOR in SANDUSKY, OHIO. www.ghostlymanor.com This haunt was recommended to us from the operator of the now defunct THE HAUNTING in ADRIAN, and it instantly became an Ohio favorite of ours along with the also now defunct TERRORTOWN in TOLEDO. Owner/operator MR of TERRORTOWN took his staff by surprise years ago... After opening night, he called a special staff meeting where he announced they would have to finish the season without him because... The next day, he flew to Los Angeles to work with ROB ZOMBIE on his haunted house! TERRORTOWN is gone, but their website isn’t. www.terrortown.net OCTOBER 11, 2019 FRIDAY 3:30 AM - RANDOM ASSOCIATIONS So I was at the local grocery store last night, getting guacamole and such. Avocados are really good for you... I asked my cashier if she goes to haunted houses...she lit up and said she went to AZRA last year and was blown away! AZRA won THREE ZIOPTIS AWARDS last year, as well as an honorable mention. We can’t wait to see them this season after such an amazing start last year. Another cashier chimed in, saying she went to WIARD’S last year and had a great time. NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD’S won a whopping FIVE ZIOPTIS AWARDS last year! OCTOBER 10, 2019 THURSDAY 4:30 AM - MEMORIES, DREAMS, REFLECTIONS Occasionally, we have out of town guests visiting during October. Whenever possible, they join us on a haunt journey. Last time is was someone from NEW YORK, and this time it’s going to be somebody from MADISON, WISCONSIN. Wisconsin reminds me of the defunct HOUSE OF FEAR that was in HAZEL PARK. Huh? HOUSE OF FEAR was a fabulous all volunteer haunt who once had a guest actor that was with the WISCONSIN JAYCEES. Pause...it was THE JAYCEES who first started the HAUNTED HOUSE CRAZE to begin with... The guest actor performed the final gag, and it was awesome: He had a custom-made costume that expanded upwards when he stood up after starting in a chair, magically growing into a super tall monster! And another gag they had was one we can’t forget: A room was decorated as if in the 1940’s, with incandescent lighting and a wooden AM radio that was playing period music backwards! In the waiting area of HOUSE OF FEAR they had a special couch. When you sat down, a giant wind machine was activated. Other great volunteer haunts we miss include BURTON HAUNTED FOREST in BURTON, HAUNTED HOLLOWS in WESTLAND, and McCURDY’S REVENGE in CORUNNA. Ah, memories... NOVEMBER 2, 2019 SATURDAY 3 PM - STEP INTO MY TIME MACHINE Flexibility is a virtue, as well as persistence. And as we mentioned earlier this season, gravity is proof that the earth sucks. That’s why your plans don’t always work out, like last night. The original plan was to hit TERROR ON 27 in ASHLEY, or HAUNTING IN IRISH HILLS and DARKSYDE ACRES. No go. So where’d you go, Zioptis? We stepped into the HAUNTED TIME MACHINE... Oh cool... you mean EREBUS the time machine disguised as a haunted house, right? Actually, no...although EREBUS is on the wish list. We ended up going to a primo OLD SCHOOL HAUNT that has never let us down...the HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME in INKSTER. NOTHIN’ FANCY, STRICTLY FAMILY HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME is big on basics while being perhaps physically the smallest haunt we went to this year. It’s jam packed with OLD SCHOOL GOODNESS, with great surprises / interaction. NOVEMBER 1, 2019 FRIDAY 6 PM - ALWAYS SOMETHING... Rats! Those darn logistics problems, getting in the way of our haunt plans again. Time to work on PLAN B... NOVEMBER 1, 2019 FRIDAY 8 AM - AND THE UNLIKELY CANDIDATE IS...(drum roll) It’s the final stretch, and plenty of BIG CITY HAUNTS to choose from. (see list of haunts open in “What’s next.” But check out the population of where we’re considering going to tonight: As of the census[2] of 2010, there were 563 people, 195 households, and 133 families residing in the village. In years past, we’d changed our BIG CITY HALLOWEEN PLANS to head to the tiny city of WEBBERVILLE for the now defunct NIGHTMARE ON ELM. So what city, wait make that VILLAGE, with a population of well under a thousand could be worth going to for great haunting? The answer is ASHLEY, MICHIGAN, home of TERROR ON 27. www.terroron27.com ASHLEY? Never heard of it, where is it? Hold out your hand, and point right to the MIDDLE OF THE MITTEN. There you go, that’s where you’ll find the centrally located ASHLEY...and perhaps us too tonight! Decisions, decisions... NOVEMBER 1, 2019 FRIDAY 2 AM - HALLOWEEN MAGIC! After much deliberation, we decided to celebrate Halloween at HUSH...after passing out candy to local Trick-or-treaters of course. The rain was incessant and the wind was howling like a thousand wolf men, but the Trick-or-treaters still came. The lure of fantasy, fun and candy outweighed minor distractions like gale force winds. With the last stragglers gone, it was time to decide where to go... HUSH is one of three obvious standout LEADERS OF THE PACK of the 2019 MICHIGAN HAUNT SCENE, and we already went to another one of them twice...GRAND RAPIDS is too far for tonight... So HUSH it was, our second visit there this season and the perfect way to FINISH WITH A BANG on Halloween night! We noticed things we missed during our first visit, like a miniature LIQUID SKY BOX the likes of which we’ve never seen before. We got some cool pictures too, and we’ll be posting them later on our Flickr photostream. Stay tuned... OCTOBER 31, 2019 THURSDAY 5 PM - The start of a NEW HALLOWEEN STORY came to me recently, but it’s long from finished. So in the meantime, here’s a repeat from 2013: NOVEMBER 2, 2013 SATURDAY 2 PM - PULL UP A CHAIR... “PIGTAILS & PUMPKINS €- BLESSED BY A GOURD” by Zioptis Inspired by Crazy Bob (Haunted Hydro in Fremont, Ohio) & adapted from a story by Bennet Cerf in “Chicken Soup For The Soul” Melissa counted out the last pennies of her fare, on a small bus in rural Wisconsin in 1967. She was 14, and it was the day after Halloween. The kids in front of the bus were still celebrating, bragging about how much candy their pillow cases held and such. Near the back of the bus was mean Mr. Turner. Nobody knew much about him, except that he used to give each Trick-or-Treater a small packet of candy on Halloween. That stopped a few years ago, but a bright Jack-o-Lantern still appeared on his front porch every Halloween. He sat on the bus with no expression on his face, and in his feeble hands was said Jack-o-Lantern. The crudely carved crooked teeth in the pumpkin resembled his own, and his clothes were ragged with the shirt buttoned wrong. Strangely, Melissa walked right past her friends, and sat down across from mean Mr. Turner who continued to look forward with an empty stare. Then suddenly he spun the pumpkin to face her, with its' silly face as he yelled "BOO!" and went back to his empty stare. Melissa shrieked just as she had the weekend before at the local Jaycee's Haunted House, but then grinned a grin like the Great Pumpkin Himself. At the next stop, the not-so-mean-after all Mr. Turner got up to leave. But he hesitated for a moment, and then thrust the jolly Jack-o-Lantern into the girl's hands. He said, "The pumpkin made you smile, I think my wife would like you to have it. I'll tell her I gave it to you." The old man hobbled out of the bus...and just before he disappeared from sight, Melissa saw him walk through the gates into a small cemetery. OCTOBER 31, 2019 THURSDAY 3 PM - HALLOWEEN HAVOC TONIGHT DERANGED in ROMULUS is closing out the season with special events tonight and November 1 & 2. www.DerangedHaunt.com Tonight is HALLOWEEN HAVOC, then on Nov. 1 it’s RAW 18+ PART 1 and Nov. 2 it’s RAW 18+ PART 2. Hmmm...RAW EIGHTEEN PLUS? We’re not sure exactly what they mean by that, but we have a good idea... Anybody remember the long-gone FOUR BEARS WATER PARK HAUNT in UTICA and what happened? Never mind that, we trust that DERANGED has more sense than they did. Then again, haunt operators can be a little weird sometimes... ;-) OCTOBER 31, 2019 THURSDAY 2 PM - Y’ALL COME BACK, HEAR? Be sure to check back at the end of the year for A SPECIAL ANNOUNCMENT! We’ll be reviewing our notes and recordings, and then...TA-DAH! Also, stay tuned for off season events like HAUNTED CHRISTMAS EVENTS, FRIDAY THE 13th HAUNTED EVENTS, A WINTER OUTDOORS COUNTRY CONCERT with FIREWORKS and more! OCTOBER 31, 2019 THURSDAY 1:30 PM - DON’T LET ME DOWN No, not the Beatles song. Today is Halloween...hooray! Also today is some really lousy weather forecast for Trick-or-Treating tonight. BOO HOO! But that won’t stop the kids from venturing off with their costumes, clutching pillow cases and such to fill with treats. Provided that people are still ready to supply those treats. THE REASON FOR THE SEASON We urge you to GIVE LOTS OF CANDY to the Trick-or-Treators tonight, and help keep alive the wonderful mystique that’s at the very core of haunting! Yes, we’re going haunting tonight as we always do on the big day. But not until the last SNICKERS BAR has been given to the last straggler in a HALLOWEEN COSTUME that comes to our door. Just as at Christmas time many people say “Jesus is the reason for the season,” we say KIDS, CANDY & FUN are the reason for the season at Halloween! Please don’t let them down. OCTOBER 31, 2019 THURSDAY 1 PM - HOCUS POCUS Today is Halloween...hooray! But did you know that today is also NATIONAL MAGIC DAY? www.nationaldaycalendar.com/national-magic-day-october-31/ And did you know that we have the WORLD’S LARGEST MAGIC COMPANY right here in Michigan? It’s ABBOTT’S MAGIC COMPANY in COLON, MICHIGAN. My brothers and I used to drool over their amazing catalog, and they have an annual magic get-together that’s legendary! www.abbottmagic.com OCTOBER 31, 2019 THURSDAY 7:30 AM - BLINDED BY SCIENCE Coming up on NBC’S THE TODAY SHOW: “Halloween on the plaza; a look is taken at the science behind fright and why people like to be scared.” So there’s science behind all this? Who would’ve known... ;-) OCTOBER 31, 2019 THURSDAY 2 AM - THE GREAT PUMPKIN ARRIVES HAPPY HALLOWEEN! We had a great DEVIL’S NIGHT with lots of other happy haunters, at FACTORY OF THE DEAD in SAGINAW and EXIT 13 in MT. MORRIS. REACH OUT AND TOUCH SOMEONE No, not the phone company ad. It was the monsters and clowns at EXIT 13, the HANDS ON HAUNT where they touch you, grab you, and...well, you’ll see what else! We’re not about to give it all away... FACTORY OF THE DEAD is by the crew that formerly did GOREGROUNDS, and the new building they have has lots of room for expansion. They had a rushed setup schedule, but you’d never know it. The show was excellent, from sets and sound/lights to actors that were all spot on with their cues. One more cool thing about FACTORY OF THE DEAD: they will be open November 8 & 9, 2019 with BLACKOUT NIGHTS. (sound & actors will be in place) They’re inviting all other haunts to visit gratis! OCTOBER 30, 2019 WEDNESDAY 5 PM - DEVIL’S NIGHT FUN! We’re off to FACTORY OF THE DEAD in SAGINAW and EXIT 13 in MT. MORRIS (near FLINT) tonight. FACTORY OF THE DEAD is now run by CH who did GOREGROUNDS previously, and we can’t wait to see what’s up! The building they’re in on LAPEER AVE. is massive, and was formerly NIGHTCRAWLERS. www.factoryofthedead.com EXIT 13 is the haunt that gives you a unique choice of whether or not TO BE TOUCHED BY THE MONSTERS! We said YES when we went last year...in fact we loved it so much we went twice in 2018! www.exit13hauntedhouse.com OCTOBER 30, 2019 WEDNESDAY 3 AM - ORIGIN OF THE SPECIES Everything starts as a thought. But who had the first thought to put together what would become THE VERY FIRST HAUNTED HOUSE EVER? We asked MR. GOOGLE and found this: “The first verifiable Jaycees haunted attraction as recognized by the Jaycees national office was The WSAI Haunted House in Cincinnati, Ohio operated by the Sycamore-Deer Park Jaycees in 1970. In 1974, The Haunted Schoolhouse, located in Akron, Ohio, opened to the public and is still in operation to this day.” Wait a second... MUTILATION MANSION in MADISON HEIGHTS ran from 1966 to 2006. It too was started by THE JAYCEES, and who remembers ANXIETY ALLEY in LINCOLN PARK...also JAYCEES late 60’s I think...they even have a memorial FACEBOOK PAGE: www.facebook.com/AnxietyAlley/ Okay, all of this supports the notion that HAUNTED HOUSES STARTED NOT IN OHIO BUT IN MADISON HEIGHTS, MICHIGAN! Wait a second... MR. GOOGLE also says to check Wikipedia and another story emerges that’s hard to dispute: “Halloween-themed haunted houses in America seemed to begin emerging during the Great Depression, about the same time as trick-or-treat.[7] But the haunted house as an American cultural icon can be traced to a single event. The Haunted Mansion opened in Disneyland August 9, 1969. The attraction became a near-instant success.[8] A single-day record of 82,516 guests was established soon after it opened. In 1973, Knott's Berry Farm began hosting its own Halloween night attraction, Knott's Scary Farm, which soon became the gold standard of Halloween events.[9][10] Evangelical Christians became early adopters of alternative Halloween attractions. Jerry Falwell and Liberty University introduced one of the first "hell houses" in 1972.[11] Two sides to every story...at least. (Editor’s note: while checking the links in the Wikipedia article above we clicked on “trick-or-treat” and they show a cute picture of a child in a skeleton costume from REDFORD MICHIGAN in 1979!) NOVEMBER 2, 2019 SATURDAY 6 PM - THE LAST HURRAH Haunts open on Saturday, Nov. 2, 2019: AWAKEN - LESLIE AZRA - MADISON HEIGHTS BATE’S HAUNTED SAWMILL - MILLINGTON BESTMAZE CORN MAZE & TRAIL OF TERRORS, WILLIAMSTON CORN MAZE ADVENTURE PARK & PUMPKIN PATCH - CASCO TWP. www.cornfun.com DARKSYDE ACRES - JONESVILLE DERANGED - ROMULUS (RAW 18+ PART 2) EDSON INCIDENT - BAY CITY EREBUS - PONTIAC EXIT 13 - MT. MORRIS FACTORY OF THE DEAD - SAGINAW (ALSO OPEN with BLACKOUT on Nov. 8 & 9, 2019) THE HAUNT - GRAND RAPIDS (BLACKOUT) HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME - INKSTER HAUNTED HYDRO - FREMONT, OHIO HUSH HAUNT - WESTLAND (GLOW STICK FRIGHT NIGHT) JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD - JACKSON MORROW ROAD HAUNTED TRAIL - ST. CLAIR TWP. NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD’S - YPSILANTI NILES SCREAM PARK - NILES (BLACKOUT) PURGATORY BY WYANDOTTE JAYCEES - WYANDOTTE ROTTEN MANOR, HOLLY THE SCREAM MACHINE - TAYLOR SHAWHAVEN HAUNTED FARM - MASON TERROR ON 27 - ASHLEY THE VILLAGE OF THE LIVING DEAD - ST. CHARLES WICKED WOODS OF TERROR - CARO NOVEMBER 2, 2019 SATURDAY 4 PM - ORIGIN OF THE SPECIES PART 2 Earlier we discussed how haunted houses came to be, and that THE JAYCEES were largely responsible. Well, THE WYANDOTTE JAYCEES are still at it! From their Facebook page: "Hell is empty and all the devils are here." - William Shakespeare A SIMPLE “YES OR NO” QUESTION Politicians are famous for evading these questions, but here’s one we’re sure you can answer easily: can you name ANY other haunt that’s been around for FORTY THREE YEARS??? www.facebook.com/events/796272760770823/ Hmmm, they must be doing something right and they’re open tonight! Decisions, decisions... NOVEMBER 15, 2019 FRIDAY 6 PM - TRICK OR TREAT TONIGHT IN FENTON Whoopee, it’s Halloween again! Well, not exactly...but that’s what it looks like in Fenton right now. Huh? My partner just called telling me there’s lots of women wandering the streets of DOWNTOWN FENTON right now, all carrying blue bags that say STATE BANK on them. They’re all collecting goodies, and wine too from various businesses. She had stopped at EL TOPO (where we ate earlier on a haunt night) and women with the blue bags were enjoying margaritas there. But the biggest surprise came next, as familiar voices yelled at my partner from the street. It was her stepsister and niece, inviting her to join them for wine to which she replied “Thanks anyway, I just had tequila!” The festivities continue until 9 PM. Details: www.facebook.com/events/fenton-michigan-ladies-night-out/553146172101347/ NOVEMBER 14, 2019 THURSDAY 5 PM - RANDOM MOMENTS OF GREATNESS We saw so many amazing things in the 2019 HAUNT SEASON our heads are still spinning! A few highlights, in no particular order: At SLAUGHTERHOUSE in FOWLERVILLE - a nightmarish encounter with the AMAZON LADY “ALEXA” who reacts in real time to each group. FABULOUS! At THE HAUNT in GRAND RAPIDS - the miniature merry-go-round room with crazy out of their mind circus characters. SUPREME WACKINESS! At AZRA CHAMBER OF HORRORS HH in MADISON HEIGHTS - the GIANT EYEBALL ROOM near the end with colorful crazy clowns freaking out. At HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION in WESTLAND - the BIG MANSION FEEL, the exceedingly prim and proper HOTEL CONCIERGE, the incredible GIANT BUCKING HORSE on your left, and the HIDEOUS SILVER GIANT on your right. NOVEMBER 11, 2019 MONDAY 11:11 AM - LEST WE FORGET Happy ELEVEN-ELEVEN ELEVEN-ELEVEN! IN HONOR AND MEMORY OF FALLEN HEROES And of course we recognize VETERANS DAY and REMEMBRANCE DAY for the Canadians out there...you hosers! haha We’d like to remind you that freedom isn’t free! You’ve got to pay a price, you’ve got to sacrifice, for your liberty. NOVEMBER 7, 2019 THURSDAY 4 PM - DO IT TO ME ONE MORE TIME FACTORY OF THE DEAD in SAGINAW is open this weekend, Friday & Saturday Nov. 8 & 9! www.factoryofthedead.com It’s billed as a BLACKOUT EVENT, but not totally as glow sticks are given and limited lighting will be on for safety’s sake. The actors and sound will all be in place! General admission at the door is $16, or free if you’re a haunt operator and 1/2 off ($8) if you’re a haunt worker. If you’re a haunt operator or haunt worker, you must pre-register by calling CHRIS ASAP at (616) 666-1190. FACTORY OF THE DEAD will have various off-season events too, along with other haunts which we’ll list as the time grows near so stay tuned... NOVEMBER 7, 2019 THURSDAY 6 AM - DEAD MAN’S PARTY Every year as FAT TUESDAY approaches, many people attend one of the BIGGEST PARTIES OF THE YEAR... It’s a GIANT CELEBRATION you may know by another name, MARDI GRAS which takes place in NEW ORLEANS. Problem is, NEW ORLEANS is quite a distance from THE MITTEN and it’s prone to flooding and hurricanes...what to do? TA-DAH! HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION will be THROWING A BOURBON STREET PARTY right at Cherry Hill & Newburgh in Westland! We don’t know exactly what they’ll do, but if we know HUSH it’s gonna have a SUPER SPOOKY EDGE! There’s incredible amounts of good vibes associated with this location, as it’s the site of the former SKATELAND WEST where so many people had so much fun for many years. Not only that, but the original decrepit building has been replaced with a brand new structure so there’s no infrastructure problems. The new building is massive, and they own it giving them the flexibility to do almost anything. Date & details yet to be announced, stay tuned... NOVEMBER 4, 2019 MONDAY 3 PM - WHY WE CHOOSE TO GET SCARED This question is at the very root of haunted attractions, and sociologist MARGEE KERR has lots of the answers. She recently appeared on TV in CANADA on CBC-TV’s THE NATURE OF THINGS: www.cbc.ca/natureofthings/features/the-science-of-the-scare-designing-the-perfect-haunted-house MARGEE KERR also appeared on NBC-TV NEWS in the USA: www.youtube.com/watch?v=91bJ1UnzH7E or www.nbcnews.com/now/video/the-science-behind-being-scared-72546885905 Stand by for more later with big news about HUSH in WESTLAND. NOVEMBER 3, 2019 SUNDAY 3 PM - CALIFORNIA DREAMING We just saw something on CBS NEWS that looks way cool, and has interactive elements reminiscent of the haunted attraction experience to boot. www.cbsnews.com/news/enter-the-immersive-world-of-sante-fe-art-collective-meow-wolf/ and www.meowwolf NOVEMBER 3, 2019 SUNDAY 2 PM - EAT THE CAKE We finished off our season last night with a BANG with a group that’s been haunting for 43 YEARS! PURGATORY by the WYANDOTTE JAYCEES delivered the goods from start to end, with no weak spots whatsoever. Unique interaction is their hallmark, starting in the queue line with a request for you to confess your sins. Having a specific story line makes for a more interesting haunt experience, and each actor has a quirky idiosyncrasy they’re proud to display. After all, when you’re insane it’s the rest of the world that’s mad! Review coming later, but here’s some highlights: Just before entering you receive conflicting advice: one actor says when offered the choice, DON’T EAT THE CAKE and another says to EAT THE CAKE! Of course we played into the gag and did eat the cake, and it was delicious! This haunt is as old as the hills, yet is up to date with modern lighting techniques starting with a double-sided GREEN LIQUID SKY ROOM that nailed it. And we loved their BLACKLIGHT ROOM with colorful poles and such. High flying acrobatics keep the action coming from every possible location, and a good amount of disorientation and dark passageways round out the experience. Our apologies to DARKSYDE ACRES, EREBUS, GHOSTLY MANOR, HAUNTED HYDRO, HAUNTING IN IRISH HILLS, and TERROR ON 27 for missing them this season.
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RECYCLE BIN 2021 Nope, that’s not a typo. It’s MISS PIGGY from THE MUPPETS with a first ever for the amazing world created by the legendary JIM HENSON (R.I.P.) as GONZO is dared to spend a night at the MUPPETS HAUNTED MANSION. It drops on Halloween exclusively on DISNEY +, and looks like a sure winner! https://variety.com/2021/tv/news/muppets-haunted-mansion-halloween-disney-plus-1234968419/
“Hey Zioptis! So you went to HUSH and ELOISE ASYLUM, right? Everybody is talking about them.” As well they should, but nope. We had a hankering for nature, getting back to roots and such... “So you hit ROTTEN FOREST & THE MANOR?” Nope again. We decided to start our tour this year at TERRORFIED FOREST in PINCKNEY. In a word it was...PHENOMONAL! We actually went to commune with nature...and a bunch of ghoulish monsters showed up OCTOBER 2, 2021 SATURDAY 2 AM - A FOREST TOUR DE FORCE LIKE NO OTHER We decided to start our tour this year at TERRORFIED FOREST in PINCKNEY. In a word it was...PHENOMENAL! We’ve been going to this haunt for decades, and they’ve never failed to amaze us. The new show at TERRORFIED is a relentless bonkers off-the-chart feast for the senses! (review under construction in Reviews 2021) Originally, we thought we’d start off our season with HUSH and ELOISE ASYLUM...and don’t get me wrong we’re SUPER ANXIOUS to see them both.. But my partner and I made a decision...we’re gonna do the “delayed gratification thing and wait a bit until we HIT THE BIG TWO DETROIT HAUNTS everybody is talking about... HUSH and ELOISE ASYLUM IS A MATCH MADE IN HOLLYWOOD AND HELL! OCTOBER 2, 2021 SATURDAY 2 PM - RING! RING! 12 hours ago at 2 AM my phone rang...it’s my girlfriend calling all excited having just seen a TV news article about ELOISE ASYLUM on WDIV-TV4. She’s a nurse, and has heard all sorts of gruesome stories...most of them true about Eloise
https://www.clickondetroit.com/topic/Halloween/ https://www.oaklandcountymoms.com/ but we can honestly say this is the best we’ve ever seen here. The presentation is spot on start to finish, and a feast for the senses at every twist and turn OCTOBER 2, 2021 SATURDAY 4 AM - A FOREST TOUR DE FORCE LIKE NO OTHER We’re SUPER STOKED to see the new show at HUSH and then GO INSANE AT ELOISE ASYLUM! ***SIDEBAR - My BFF just called me all freaking out about seeing ELOISE on the WDIV-TV4 NEWS...it brought back memories of when she actually visited a friend that had been thrown in there...it was anything but a place that could be called a hospital. There were patients sprawled over in the halls moaning and screaming bloody murder...absolutely horrible! ****************************************************************** Our stick-in-the-mud friends missed out big time. We made it to THE GREAT FENTON BEAN COMPANY HAUNT in FENTON 5 minutes before closing time, and it was killer! They had a vibrating floor which we had never yet seen. And it was their Swan Song...it was the last performance before the haunt CROSSED THE RAINBOW BRIDGE if there is such a thing for haunted houses ********************************************************************* OCTOBER 7, 2021 THURSDAY 8 PM - THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE Let’s say you go to a haunted house, and find out it REALLY IS HAUNTED! This has happened to us only a few times through countless journeys, and it’s something you never forget. The haunts where this occurred were THE REALM OF DARKNESS in PONTIAC, ABANDONED in MELVINDALE, and HAUNTED PRISON EXPERIENCE in MANSFIELD, OHIO. There were lots of paranormal groups that came in with their high-tech gear, hoping to document the strange happenings. And at THE REALM OF DARKNESS, things took an unexpected turn that CRANKED IT TO ELEVEN! Our church pastor had called us, asking if we knew a haunted house where he could record a church sermon about SUPERNATURAL HAPPENINGS to be presented on video later on. That’s how we came to introduce PASTOR J (Jeremy Schossau) from METRO CITY CHURCH in TAYLOR to REALM. We all met at the haunt, and went through enjoying the fabulous show. Then the haunt operator and PASTOR J had a pow-wow, and the keys to the haunt were loaned to him to come back the next morning for the video taping. The next Sunday the tape was shown at both campuses of METRO CITY CHURCH. But the BIG NEWS wasn’t revealed until the following Sunday, when PASTOR J said he wanted to show some additional video footage...absolutely unedited...showing clear evidence of ACTUAL SUPERNATURAL ACTIVITY while they were there, and the ONLY people in the giant building at the time OCTOBER 7, 2021 THURSDAY 9 PM - WHETHER THE WEATHER CHANGES THINGS Tomorrow the forecast includes rain...rats! We’re anxious to check out FRIGHT VILLAGE in LAKE ORION which has an outdoor forest walk as well as 3 walk through haunts. And there’s hayrides galore like at WIARD’S in YPSILANTI, SLAUGHTERHOUSE in FOWLERVILLE, SHAWHAVEN in MASON, BLAKE’S in ARMADA, SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK in LENOX TWP., and ROTTEN HAYRIDE (new at ROTTEN MANOR) in HOLLY. OCTOBER 8, 2021 FRIDAY 2 PM - RAIN, RAIN, GO AWAY...COME AGAIN SOME OTHER DAY! Oh no! If you’re a farmer you may call it “liquid sunshine.” But we live on a street that’s prone to flooding WOW! We had an INCREDIBLE FRIDAY NIGHT with THE NEW DETROIT DYNAMIC DUO of HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION and ELOISE ASYLUM. We started at HUSH & WHAT A RUSH IT IS! This place will scramble your senses with an artistic flair nobody else has come close to from what we’ve seen. You’ll never see anything like it ***SIDEBAR*** We got some PRIMO PHOTOS AT HUSH, to be released soon! We use a 24 Megapixel Nikon DSLR camera. My partner flipped when she saw the DOLL ROOM photos, but the whole place is amazing! This place will scramble your senses with an artistic flair like nobody else OCTOBER 10, 2021 SUNDAY 2 AM - PHYSICS REDEFINED Yesterday we learned that GRAVITY IS A MYTH. THE EARTH SUCKS. That’s why your plans don’t always work out! Plans like going to THE HOWLING in FENTON and CARNIVAL CREEP SHOW in FLINT. That would’ve been sweet! But it was just one of those days, rats! OCTOBER 12, 2021 TUESDAY 3 AM - RECOMMENDED BY MOM Make that recommended by OCTOBER 12, 2021 TUESDAY 4 AM - A MATTER OF TRUST There’s lots of people out there telling you go to this haunt, go to that haunt... But who are they, and what makes them qualified to say which you should go to? Your money is at stake, you don’t want Fake News! Who should you believe? Well, what if the person saying you REALLY must go to a certain haunt was somebody who owned another haunt? Now THAT is an opinion you should listen to, right? OCTOBER 13, 2021 WEDNESDAYS 3 PM - BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS Parts of Oakland County like ORION TWP. were inundated with as much as EIGHT INCHES OF RAIN IN TWO HOURS recently, causing massive destruction. OH NO! Oakland County has some new haunts we’re anxious to experience, including FRIGHT VILLAGE at CANTERBURY VILLAGE and ROTTEN HAYRIDE (at ROTTEN MANOR) OCTOBER 13, 2021 WEDNESDAY 11:11 PM - BEAM ME UP SCOTTY Today, CAPTAIN KIRK WENT TO OUTER SPACE FOR REAL! Sorta. Actor William Shatner went to the edge of space today in the BLUE ORIGIN OCTOBER 15, 2021 FRIDAY 10 PM - FOUR LEGS ON A MISSION I can’t believe it. What a deal, the way things work out sometimes. Check this out: So last Monday we started thinking about a WEEKEND OUT OF STATE ROAD TRIP...we miss GHOSTLY MANOR / LAKE EERIE FEARFEST in SANDUSKY, OHIO & CRAZY BOB AT HAUNTED HYDRO in FREMONT, OHIO. And yes, we’re taking an out-of-state trip tomorrow and we’re really excited! But we’re not going to OHIO. ONCE IN A LIFETIME - ADOPT DON’T SHOP My partner currently has two rescue Dobermans, for a total of 8 she’s had so far. There’s “Daisy Mae,” a senior citizen and “Odin” the rambunctious boy. Anyway, she’s been looking for a young female Doberman because inevitably Daisy Mae will be CROSSING THE RAINBOW BRIDGE. Odin will be so lonely! He’s gonna need a new buddy to play with on the ranch there...but female Dobermans are very rare to find. But then, searching cyber space, my partner ran across a photo from a shelter of a YOUNG FEMALE DOBERMAN THAT LOOKS LIKE DAISY~!! It’s even the same DILUTE BLUE COLOR with uncropped ears. KISMET ON STEROIDS She excitedly showed the picture to her co-workers, who noticed something that totally escaped her... One coworker asked, “WHAT are your dog’s names? Daisy Mae and Odin. Another piped in, “Didn’t you see what this dog’s name is? It’s ODINA.” She honestly had not noticed the almost identical name. (My partner is a FRAZZLED FRONT LINE WORKER at a pharmacy in a giant store, giving COVID TESTS & VACCINE SHOTS.) What are the chances of this happening? To rescue two different dogs from two different places whose names differ by only one letter of the alphabet?! Well, I’m a math dummy so I can’t tell you the odds...but it sure is ONE WHOPPER OF A CO-INKY-DINK! FAMILY FIRST So here we are, about to take a long road trip that does not have a haunted house at the end of it. BOO HOO! FOUR PAWS ON A MISSION But we just might have a new member of our family by this time tomorrow, and that’s a great ending for any day. OCTOBER 17, 2021 SUNDAY 3 PM - A VALIANT EFFORT Not all things are meant to work out, try as we might... HOLY TOLEDO! Wait a second, what if we make that UNHOLY TOLEDO??!! And what if it became an INSTANT HIT and the NEW PRIMO TOLEDO MEGA HAUNT? Then we’d say that HAUNTED X accomplished its’ mission to create A NEW PLACE WHERE NIGHTMARES ARE REAL. We can’t wait! Stand by, my little monkeys...pay no attention to the man behind the curtain... OCTOBER 20, 2021 WEDNESDAY 11 PM - Now working on reviews for ELOISE ASYLUM and HUSH both in Westland. - www.zioptis.com/html/2021.shtml gives a feeling like this is a giant machine stealing souls and sending them to never never land! OCTOBER 24, 2021 SUNDAY 3 AM - SO NEAR & SO FAR We just found out that gravity is a myth. The earth sucks. That’s why your plans don’t always work out. Our over optimistic plan for Saturday night was to hit 4 haunts, but we only made 2 of them... THE HOWLING in FENTON had their closing night for the season last night Oct. 3 so we went there first, after obtaining some exquisite haunting sustenance at EL TOPO in FENTON. Yeah, we got the fever...the kind that makes you do crazy things like try to hit 4 haunts in one night! Sheesh, we talked to a guy just last night (LEONARD PICKEL) who hit 200 HAUNTS IN A SEASON! Now, wouldn’t THAT be the life? Traveling all over In a perfect world, we also would’ve made it to FACTORY OF THE DEAD in SAGINAW and SLAY NIGHTS - DEADLY CHOICES in HOWELL on Saturday night. OCTOBER 24, 2021 SUNDAY 6 PM - THE MADNESS NEVER ENDS Sunday is a day many go to church...we get that. But it’s also a great day to go haunting! Lots of excellent haunts are OPEN SUNDAY NIGHT including: AZRA CHAMBER OF HORRORS in MADISON HEIGHTS, BLAKE’S BIG APPLE HAUNTED ATTRACTIONS in ARMADA, DERANGED HAUNT in ROMULUS, ELOISE ASYLUM in WESTLAND, EREBUS in PONTIAC, EXIT 13 in MT. MORRIS, HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION in WESTLAND, JACKSON’S UNDERWORLD in JACKSON, NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD’S in YPSILANTI, ROTTEN MANOR in HOLLY, SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK in LENOX TWP., and TERRORFIED FOREST in PINCKNEY In addition to this, AZRA CHAMBER OF HORRORS in MADISON HEIGHTS is open every day of the month of October! Not only is it a killer haunt (WINNER OF MULTIPLE ZIOPTIS AWARDS), they have lots of other FUN STUFF like RAGE ROOMS, an AXE THROW and ESCAPE ROOMS. www.azrahaunt.com Rats! Where is my magic wand when I need it? If I could just wave it just so...I’d bring back this haunt...oh yeah, I’d also have to wave it again to ring back another haunt WE MISS SO MUCH... OCTOBER 25, 2021 MONDAY 9 PM - THE ALPHA & THE OMEGA For every person you’ll ever meet, there’s a first time and a last time you’ll ever see them. And there’s no way to know exactly when that last time will be. THE SWEETEST SWAN SONG We never saw it coming, and in retrospect we don’t think they did either. But every dog has his day in the limelight, only to disappear later...sometimes when least expected. Maybe it’s better that way. Final “goodbyes” can be sad and awkward. WITH MUCH LOVE AS FRIENDS And so it is that we pay a heart felt tribute to...BOZO THE CLOWN! (STILL BEING WRITTEN) SEPTEMBER 27, 2021 MONDAY 10 PM - GOING TO THE DOGS Shortly, we’ll tell you about a haunt that has gone to the dogs...literally! But first we’re going off topic a bit with an amazing true story that would touch the heart of even Dracula... We saw this on the NBC News a few years ago as a feel-good ending after having to tell all the horrible stuff going on: It’s about two stray dogs found wondering in a post California neighborhood, a husky and a small mutt that never saw a barber. This thing was a giant ball-of-hair! OCTOBER 26, 2021 TUESDAY 2 AM - w/t/ A CAN OF SARDINES AND A HOT DOG DINNER IN TOLEDO BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS - BULLDOG BRAND SARDINES IN MUSTARD SAUCE SUNNY SEA BRAND KIPPER SNACKS & THE END OF THE WORLD Pay no attention to the prankster behind the keyboard. OCTOBER 26, 2021 TUESDAY 3 AM - Pay no attention to this nonsense...there’s something wrong here...we are not responsible. Thank you. Brought to you by UNCLE FERD’S TRUSSES FOR THE DISCRIMINATING FEW. If it doesn’t say UNCLE FERD’S FLUSH IT! OCTOBER 26, 2021 TUESDAY 2 AM - A CAN OF SARDINES Here’s yet another spin on MICHIGAN HAUNTS: https://www.thrillist.com/lifestyle/nation/best-haunted-houses-in-michigan p.s. Pay no attention to the annoying auto-correct feature. How do you turn this stupid thing off? OCTOBER 27, 2021 WEDNESDAY 6 PM - THIS LITTLE PIGGY WEE WEE WEE ALL THE WAY HOME Actually, we have seen haunts come back after disappearing like THE SCREAM MACHINE who took a year off when Covid-19 hit  despite being competitors So we’ll miss a haunt when they’re gone CROSSED THE RAINBOW BRIDGE if there is such a thing for haunts. haha Even worse is when it comes after talk of expansion. After talking to haunt operators for so many years, we’ve come to feel like we’re all in the same family We never had to go looking for CHARLIE, he always spotted us and greeted us with a big smi  CHARLIE made his own giant hayride props, many from old farm equipment! There was a MASSIVE METALLIC SPIDER that suddenly attacked from above for a GIANT WOW! He made the forest come alive with thousands of GREEN FIREFLIES, and showed us feature horror movies on a big screen. **DISCLAIMER!** We are NOT saying a haunt has to have a GIANT PHYSICAL THRILL FACTOR!! DO NOT SPIN US AROUND! DO NOT CONFUSE OUR SENSES! DO NOT PLUNGE US INTO TOTAL SENSORY DEPRIVATION! OCTOBER 30, 2021 SATURDAY 2 AM - BUCKEYE BROTHERS Last night was OHIO TRIP NIGHT, a piece of cake with the GPS unit...we used to get lost almost every year going to TERRORTOWN, and MARK was always so patient with us... We went to GHOSTLY MANOR in SANDUSKY and DISTRACTED HAUNTED HOUSE in BOWLING GREEN last night OCTOBER 31, 2021 SUNDAY 5 AM - WEBSITE DIFFICULTY Somehow I pushed a wrong button, and the entire main page disappeared! Fortunately I saved a previous version about a week ago, and retrieved the missing stuff from the online site. We miss our webmaster, BILL GODWIN...r.i.p. We lost him to Covid last March, and depended on him when things like this happened. It’s taking a massive amount of effort to get things back, and some things will have to remain unfixed like different colors which are now all black and an annoying capital “A” appearing with a squiggle mark above it. NOVEMBER 4, 2021 THURSDAY 2 AM - LAND OF A THOUSAND DANCES No two people dance exactly the same. Okay, they do sometimes...or at least they try to on DANCING WITH THE STARS which for the record I have never watched No two people dance exactly the same. Okay, maybe they try to on that dance show on ABC (which I never watched). NOVEMBER 3, 2021 THURSDAY 3 AM - THE FAT LADY HASN’T SUNG “It ain’t over until the fat lady sings” goes an old saying It goes back to MANCHESTER, ENGLAND where a young man in contact with THE HOUSE OF SHOCK would eventually be offered the job of Operations Manager for ELOISE ASYLUM. It was a no-brainer, and now we have an INTERNATIONAL TEAM OF MANIACS / MAD SCIENTISTS in charge at the Asylum! NOVEMBER 10, 2021 WEDNESDAY 2 AM - SAFE AS MILK Sorry to suddenly go silent, but this time it was by choice. Thing is, we had a potential bad situation that needed to be resolved before we said anything. **BACKSTORY** We try to stay positive, and avoid say anything that might spook people from going haunting. For example traffic jam delays, deer collision wrecks and such. A BUCKET OF PURELL Some of our friends (and my girlfriend) had cautioned us earlier in the haunt season, saying stuff like “What?! You’re going to haunted houses in the middle of a worldwide pandemic?! ARE YOU CRAZY?” Maybe we are, but all’s well that ends well... NOVEMBER 10, 2021 WEDNESDAY 2 AM - SAFE AS MILK Sorry to suddenly go silent, but we had to see how something played out before saying anything. About 5 days after going to the last haunt I got a sore throat and started running a fever. Next my sense of smell disappeared...UH OH! We didn’t wear masks at the last haunts...was that a horrible mistake? We didn’t wear masks at the last haunts & they were both crankin’...how could we be so stupid? We didn’t wear masks at the last haunts...how could we be so stupid? I called my partner...she’s a frazzled front line worker giving COVID TESTS & VACCINES at a big name pharmacy Here there’s like 3 to 4 thousand new infections every day in Michigan, and there were COVID DISCLAIMER STATEMENTS on the haunt websites... lost of my sense of smell...running a fever w/ sore throat...UH OH! Some of our friends (and my girlfriend) had cautioned us earlier in the haunt season, saying stuff like “What?! You’re going to haunted houses in the middle of a worldwide pandemic?! ARE YOU CRAZY?” We’re still right in the middle of a worldwide pandemic that has KILLED OVER 750,000 IN THE USA, including our beloved Webmaster Bill Godwin. R.I.P. BROTHER IN MUSIC & LIFE. Maybe we are, but all’s well that ends well... We generally try to stay positive, and avoid say anything that might spook people from going haunting i.e. traffic jam delays, deer collision wrecks and such. Sorry to suddenly go silent, but we had to see how something played out before saying anything...and this was potential life or death but this time it was by choice. Thing is, we had a potential bad situation that needed to be resolved before we said anything. **BACKSTORY** We try to stay positive, and avoid say anything that might spook people from going haunting. For example traffic jam delays, deer collision wrecks and such. A BUCKET OF PURELL Some of our friends (and my girlfriend) had cautioned us earlier in the haunt season, saying stuff like “What?! You’re going to haunted houses in the middle of a worldwide pandemic?! ARE YOU CRAZY?” Maybe we are, but all’s well that ends well...
Sorry to suddenly go silent, but this time it was by choice. Thing is, we had a potential bad situation that needed to be resolved before we said anything. **BACKSTORY** We try to stay positive, and avoid say anything that might spook people from going haunting. For example traffic jam delays, deer collision wrecks and such. A BUCKET OF PURELL Some of our friends (and my girlfriend) had cautioned us earlier in the haunt season, saying stuff like “What?! You’re going to haunted houses in the middle of a worldwide pandemic?! ARE YOU CRAZY?” Maybe we are, but all’s well that ends well... being written NOVEMBER 15, 2021 MONDAY 11 PM -  ONCE IN A LIFETIME Imagine for a moment that you’ve decided to create your own HAUNTED ATTRACTION, and that price is no object. The hankering to make your own haunt has become an obsession. Congratulations! You’re now part of a very select group of people that have decided making a haunted attraction would be a smart thing to do. You’ve already seen all the haunts in Michigan, so you go on a whirlwind tour visiting HUNDREDS of haunts across North America. You go to HAUNTCON and TRANSWORLD, and visit SCARE FACTORY in OHIO...
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