HAUNTED HOUSE HOTLINE

a free public service from the

ZIOPTIS FOUNDATION in Detroit, The Haunted House Capital of the World.

WELCOME TO THE ZIOPTIS FOUNDATION HAUNTED HOUSE HOTLINE, your insider fast track to the HOTTEST HAUNTED ATTRACTIONS in Michigan and the whole nation! We attend as many haunts as possible each year, and post reviews that are archived for future reference.

Our mission is to give you an authentic feel of what each haunt is like, but without giving away too much. It's a challenge we're up to, because we don't want to spoil the experience for you!

Don't think of us as judges, but as storytellers. Every haunt has a story, and we'll bring it to life right here. It's almost like going to a haunted house without going to a haunted house!

You'll also find info on off-season haunt events as well as alternative entertainment, so stay tuned. Stuff like fireworks displays in the winter, free concerts, and where to see amazing automated Christmas light displays.

WE ARE INDEPENDENT AND NON-PROFIT. The website has large type and is dial-up friendly for maximum accessibility to all. Localities appear in red for easy identification. And the original, one and only Free ZIOPTIS DIAL-A-TRIP that started the ball rolling in 1986 is still available 24/7 at (313) 274-1111.

History - in the mid-90's, we started adding stories at the end of the Dial-A-Trip episodes in October about the coolest haunted houses we went to. So much interest was generated that in 1999 the decision was made to start a separate service, and the HAUNTED HOUSE HOTLINE was born!

NO ADVERTISING! NO COOKIES! JUST THE GOODS.

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NOVEMBER 19, 2017 SUNDAY 8 PM - NOT JUST FOR HALLOWEEN ANYMORE

Big news from JACKSON'S UNDERWORLD in JACKSON...

After our yearly visit here, the owner/operator told us "I'm in the business of FUN! But we don't want it to end with Halloween, so..."

He then took us behind the scenes in another part of the building to show us a most amazing Christmas wonderland in the works. We instantly were transported back in time mentally to the DOWNTOWN DETROIT HUDSON'S DEPT. STORE XMAS DISPLAYS, if any of you remember that...

We can't wait to see the final result! Check this out: www.TheTownOfChristmas.com

RATS! We're going off-the-air again, while this computer goes back. We have another old XP computer to replace it, but we don't have the password and we're waiting to see if we can get it. Unbelieveable...it's been just one thing after another, trying to get the website back!

But we WILL back, as soon as possible...stand by...

NOVEMBER 18, 2017 SATURDAY 1 AM - GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN

Just updated: "Closed" where we list haunts that now R.I.P.!

The total now is 66...sigh...the list grows every year but that's okay because nothing lasts forever and there's also new haunts every year!

NOVEMBER 17, 2017 FRIDAY 11 PM - THE CAN NEARS THE EDGE...

We'll be spilling some really big beans soon!

It's about an off season event at a big time haunt you've probably been to.

This is major...stand by, my little monkeys!

NOVEMBER 16, 2017 THURSDAY 2 PM - SANTA FLIPS THE SWITCH!

Tonight is the Opening Ceremony of the 2017 WAYNE COUNTY LIGHTFEST, and we have it on good authority that SANTA CLAUS HIMSELF will appear to give stuff away and then flip the switch that turns on all the lights at once!

And there's FIREWORKS TOO!

It all starts at 6 PM tonight at Merriman Hollow right off the HINES DRIVE ENTRANCE AT MERRIMAN ROAD IN WESTLAND. Full details: www.waynecounty.com/departments/publicservices/parks/wayne-county-lightfes t.aspx

In the past, they've let everyone go through for free on this first night only!

Also, today is the GREAT AMERICAN SMOKEOUT DAY in support of those trying to free themselves of tobacco addiction.

We know many who smoke, and we feel compelled to now share an important fact that we've already shared with them...

And this is something we guarantee the tobacco company does NOT want you to know!

(To see what it is, go to "News" and see the entry near the bottom of the page from November 6, 2014)

NOVEMBER 12, 2017 SUNDAY 11 PM - NOTHIN' BUT THE FACTS, MA'AM...

So much to tell you about the haunts we visited this year! Usually we post reviews as we go along, but sadly that wasn't an option this year.

To start with, here's a list of the haunts we visited this year:

1. CLIO MANOR HAUNTED HOUSE, FLINT

2. ST. LUCIFER'S, FLINT

3. 13 FEET UNDER, FLINT

4. HAUNTING IN THE HILLS, IRISH HILLS

5. JACKSON'S UNDERWORLD, JACKSON

6. ROTTEN MANOR, HOLLY

7. TERRORFIED FOREST & MANOR, PINCKNEY

8. SLAUGHTERHOUSE, FOWLERVILLE

9. HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION, WESTLAND

10. HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME, INKSTER

11. WYANDOTTE JAYCEE'S KINDRED, WYANDOTTE

12. NIGHTSTALKERS, SAGINAW

13. GOREGROUNDS / HAUNTED ELEMENTARY, BRIDGEPORT

14. WILD WOODS OF TERROR, KOCHVILLE TWP.

15. PHANTOM FOREST HAYRIDE, GROSSE ILE

16. THE SCREAM MACHINE, TAYLOR

17. HOUSE OF DAMNATION, MAUMEE, OHIO

18. HAUNTED PLANET EXPERIENCE ASYLUM OF HORRORS, MAUMEE, OHIO

19. KRAZY HILDA'S, YPSILANTI

20. NIGHT TERRORS AT WIARD'S, YPSILANTI

21. THE HAUNT, GRAND RAPIDS

22. THE EDSON INCIDENT, BAY CITY

NOVEMBER 5, 2017 SUNDAY 2 AM - ATOMIC BOOM FINALE!

We had an incredible last night of haunting at EDSON INCIDENT in BAY CITY. This haunt is on a military vessel that's 418 feet long! More later...

NOVEMBER 4, 2017 SATURDAY 2 PM - THE FAT LADY SINGS

Tonight is your very last chance to go haunting this season!

But let's rewind now to the start of the season when we were forced off-the-air...happened to see an item on FOX TV 2 NEWS IN DETROIT about the triumphant return of STUART MacDONALD to ADRIAN for a 2 day stint with his new magic show!

WOW!  We wanted badly to go to his show...we miss this guy so much, and what he brought to the haunt scene...but those pesky logistics got in the way...

Back to the TV article, it gets better...he did a mind-blowing trick, then came the annoucement that STU would be on PENN & TELLER'S FOOL US TV SHOW in a few weeks.

We haven't seen the episode yet, but the operator of HAUNTED PLANET EXPERIENCE did and was as happy as a pig in...uh, slop...to tell us that STUART MacDONALD DID INDEED FOOL PENN & TELLER on NATIONWIDE TV!

We always thought this guy was not too shabby...so Stuart, if you're out there...way to go, dude...and I don't care WHAT your relatives say about you, you're OKAY in our book. Just don't get a big head on us now because of all this bigtime hoopla and such!  ;) haha

In case all this is Greek to you, in a nutshell STUART MacDONALD is a famed magician who created the now defunct THE HAUNTING in ADRIAN. (see "Closed" for more)

EAST COAST TV took Stuart away from us when THE HAUNTING suddenly shuttered without notice years ago, in a dramatic way befitting a master trickster.

NOVEMBER 3, 2017 FRIDAY 11 PM - AS LUCK WOULD HAVE IT

It's been MURPHY'S LAW ON STEROIDS trying to get things back to normal with the website...something still seriously amiss and we don't dare trying to add new REVIEW tabs yet...so where to cram new stuff?

Oh lucky day! 

Finally, something goes easy: there's an unused tab at the bottom called...duh..."Untitled". We'll use that...stand by my little monkeys...Zioptis will wave the magic wand, and give you what you want...what you crave...you can only get it right here...like when we spill some more beans soon and REVEAL STU SMITH'S NEW HAUNT LOCATION for next year...and it's closer than you might think!

For those of you that don't recognize the name STU SMITH...this guy is widely regarded as the premiere 3D ARTIST in the haunt genre, recognized worldwide for his artistic flair for many years starting with haunts like THE HAUNTING in ADRIAN...which brings up another story you gotta hear...coming next...and it involves NATIONWIDE TV COVERAGE...

NOVEMBER 3, 2017 FRIDAY 6 AM - HAPPY FRIDAY!

I can't believe it...the haunting is not over yet! We can't wait to check out the EDSON INCIDENT in BAY CITY aboard an old Vietnam era battle ship! NAUTICAL NIGHTMARE on the BOB-LO BOAT is long gone, but this looks like a BIG WINNER too...check this out: www.edsonincident.com

GOOD TO THE LAST DROP!

And there's other haunts open too this weekend; see the list in "What's Next."

Don't forget to tune back at the end of the year for a special report.

Plus, we'll be SPILLING THE BEANS about JACKSON'S UNDERWORLD before then. Trust us, this is going to be really big and super spectacular!

OCTOBER 31, 2017 TUESDAY 11 PM - WHEN THE PARTY'S OVER, TURN OUT THE LIGHTS

Wow, 230 pieces of candy went in a flash...and the wind died down so I brought out a fog machine after all...all the kids were super cute as usual...and THEN...this is so cool...

One of our trick or treaters had a costume that ESPECIALLY caught our eyes...check this out...her shirt and her jacket both said EREBUS!

pause...Hmmm...check this statement from the earlier 6 PM posting:

"In a way, I'm glad...not for the twisted foot of course...but to see the smiling faces on Superman and Superwoman and whoever else shows up..."

Anyway, back to the story...what a cool sight! I told her "Oh My God! I wanted SO bad to go to EREBUS tonight but my plans fell through." Then she says she worked there before...and it went somewhere like this...

"So I was supposed to go to EREBUS tonight, right? Okay, but I didn't make it and now I've got an EREBUS ACTOR RIGHT HERE instead? What are the chances of that!  haha  "You runnin' some PSYCHIC MUMBO JUMBO on me or somethin'?" haha (-: "What kind of monster did you play?" and so on...

It was a completely different Halloween than we envisioned...but looking back I wouldn't have it any other way! Sometimes when things go wrong, something else goes right instead... Not very often, but we'll take it!

OCTOBER 31, 2017 TUESDAY 6 PM - WHAT A DEAL...

I can't believe it! The Great Pumpkin is not smiling on us this Halloween...

So after a wild night in Grand Rapids last night, we were all set to finish off tonight at THE HAUNTED WINERY in FARMINGTON and EREBUS in PONTIAC.

My partner and I are in the best physical condition we've been in for years...she works out 3-4 days a week and I work out 6-7 days a week...we plowed through I don't even know how many haunts this year...thru forests and all kinds of tricky passages with moving floors and such...

Never did we have a single problem...UNTIL...this morning my partner woke up with her right leg asleep...nature calling...OH NO! She stumbled and landed with toes curled under on front...OUCH! Possibly a broken toe...

She's out of commision, so we're handing out candy tonight to the local youngsters. We set up an impromptu light show with black lights, strobes, and colored lights...too windy for fog machines though...but we'll be crankin' the TOD DOCKSTADER on the sound system to set the mood. More about TOD DOCKSTADER later...

In a way, I'm glad...not for the twisted foot of course...but to see the smiling faces on Superman and Superwoman and whoever else shows up...

So HAPPY HALLOWEEN to you and yours, and tune in soon for a full list of all the haunts we visited this year along with mini-reviews until we can re-do the website on a newer version (which will be no easy task...we already tried once).

OCTOBER 31, 2017 TUESDAY 2 PM - TELL ME A STORY, DADDY!

Back in 2013 when we went to THE HAUNTED HYDRO in FREMONT, OHIO, Crazy Bob inspired me to finish a Halloween theme story that had been on my mind...

It's now posted in the "News" section.

OCTOBER 30, 2017 MONDAY 3 PM - SAILING THE HIGH SEAS OF MADNESS

Who remembers the NAUTICAL NIGHTMARE? It was a haunt aboard an old BOB-LO BOAT, and it was primo!

Well, here's another haunt aboard a really large Vietnam era ship in BAY CITY. It's the EDSON INCIDENT, and they are open next weekend! (but not tonight)

We're going for sure, and you'll probably want to as well when you lookie here: www.edsonincident.com

OCTOBER 30, 2017 MONDAY 2:30 PM - DEVIL'S NIGHT DELIGHTS

We're headed into the home stretch, but there's lots of primo haunting available!

Tonight we're off to GRAND RAPIDS to THE HAUNT. Shame on us for missing them the last couple years...a thousand lashes with a wet noodle! (It doesn't hurt, but it's awfully annoying.)

OCTOBER 30, 2017 MONDAY 5 AM - INDUSTRY TITANS ON THE MOVE

Big news this year with THE REALM OF DARKNESS and THE HAUNT in GRAND RAPIDS...

REALM moved to Mississippi after it changed hands, and the lease is up at THE HAUNT'S Waldorf Street location so it's their last year there.

What will happen with THE HAUNT? Will they return somewhere else?

We can't say right now, but in the meantime it's a priority to visit THE HAUNT this season! www.the-haunt.com

If you've never experienced THE HAUNT, the clock is ticking. This is a haunt that was first recommended to us by the owner of THE SCREAM MACHINE in TAYLOR! How's THAT for an endorsement?!

OCTOBER 29, 2017 SUNDAY 10 PM - CAN YOU KEEP A GIANT TRADE SECRET?

Actually, it doesn't matter...because we're not going to tell you exactly what it is...yet...but here's a hint, and it's about JACKSON'S UNDERWORLD in JACKSON. www.jxcunderworld.com

There's something MAJOR in the works right now inside their ridiculously giant four story building...but we never reveal things ahead of the operator's schedule so we can only say this for now:

When we spill the beans...and not that far from now...you're going to want to go to JACKSON'S UNDERWORLD before next haunt season... AND YOU WILL BE AMAZED! (and thankful to Zioptis of course) haha 

OCTOBER 29, 2017 SUNDAY 9:30 PM - WILD WEEKEND BLITZ!

There's been just SO MUCH we've wanted to tell you, but couldn't due to an old XP system computer that died after 16 years...new computer not compatible...it's been a real life nightmare trying to get back ON THE AIR...but persistance is a virtue and we made it!

Sadly, we can't add new review tabs for this year yet...working on a temp fix...but a million thanks to our webmaster's g-friend for loaning us her XP COMPUTER that we need to run this program.

WE'RE JUST SO GLAD TO FINALLY BE BACK! So...onward, HAUNTED SOLDIERS...time to report, SIR! YES SIR!

Friday, we hit OHIO to check out the new show from HAUNTED PLANET EXPERIENCE which moved from TOLEDO to MAUMEE (nearby) and somehow has become an ASYLUM... and it's CRAZY INSANE!

It gets better, there's ANOTHER NEW KID IN TOWN...also only a few years old...also in MAUMEE, it's HOUSE OF DAMNATION. They have a special crew of creatures that pulls off some of the biggest and baddest crowd pleasing stunts we've ever seen, and their LIQUID SKY is to die for!

Sincere apologies for missing GHOSTLY MANOR in SANDUSKY, OHIO. This is a haunt that another haunt owner urged us to check out years ago!!! Enough said.

Then, on Saturday we hit THE PUMPKIN FACTORY in BELLEVILLE, KRAZY HILDA'S in YPSILANTI and WIARD'S NIGHT TERRORS in YPSILANTI. All three were packed with happy haunters, totally stoked on that certain crazy energy that only haunted houses can deliver!

We hit WIARD'S last on Saturday night, and WHAT A BLAST! Then chattin' up the crowd a bit...time to cruise...now it's 1 AM...so we're cruisin' back down FORD ROAD into CANTON and then into WESTLAND...and...OH! what a sight...

HOW FABULOUS! There's still several hundred people waiting excitedly to experience the NEW SHOW AT HUSH HAUNTED ATTRACTION!!!

OH NO! I don't have my camera...and even worse...

On the night of our official visit to HUSH (we've been known to go twice), before going thru the haunt we got some KILLER PHOTOS with a high resolution DSLR of the energy at the haunt. YAY! Can't wait to post them on the HUSH Facebook page later...but NO!!!

Sadly, the memory card failed  when trying to load the pics into our new computer...adding yet another DIGITAL FAILURE to this year's efforts to help promote the haunt scene.  But we're going to take the card to Westborn Camera in Dearborn and pray they can retrieve the images. Sigh...once again...HELP MR. WIZARD!!!

Lots more to tell you soon...stand by my little monkeys...

OCTOBER 29, 2017 SUNDAY 6:30 PM - TEST PUBLISH

We've had severe computer problems preventing us from uploading this season. Please stand by...

OCTOBER 29, 2016 SATURDAY 4 PM - AND TO THINK THAT I SAW IT AT KROGER LAST NIGHT

Okay, it was actually two nights ago... 11:30 PM and time for an EMERGENCY TURKEY HILL RUN TO KROGER before they close at midnight...some employees were already ALL DECKED OUT in their HALLOWEEN BEST COSTUMES.

Of course I had to tease them like bratty younger siblings... so as items are being scanned...  "Wow, jumping the gun a bit for Halloween are we? What kind of candy are you giving out?" haha giggle giggle  "OH NO! I NEED A NUTRAGEOUS RIGHT NOW." (I start fake sobbing and she responds with an obvious lack of sympathy)

"Nope, you're out of luck on that one."  "Sigh...you mean to tell me...so you're this big time cashier here...hundreds of thousands of dollars running through your greedy little mitts...but how much of that do I get?"   "NOTHING!"  "Why can't I get my cut? My fair share should be at least a couple G's don't you think?" haha giggle giggle

"HAPPY HALLOWEEN YOU SILLY GIRL, carry on and don't forget to support your local, neighborhood haunted house or The Great Pumpkin himself will hunt you down like a dog and remove your limbs."  "REALLY? The Great Pumpkin?"  "I have connections...I shouldn't tell you this but I'm with the ZIOPTIS HAUNTED HOUSE HOTLINE." (handed her a Zioptis HHH card)

OCTOBER 29, 2016 SATURDAY 4 AM - TALES FROM THE DARKSYDE

WOW! We barely recognized DARKSYDE ACRES since we last saw it in 2012, and it's all good...we loved the snarky, creative actors...and their makeup and costumes are all top flight!

BIGGER, BADDER, BETTER!

JACKSON'S UNDERWORLD has a new 3D full length attraction, painted by the owner's son! A clown theme provides the backdrop for some really wild and REALLY LARGE artwork that FLIES off the wall and floats in the air. It's an eerie feeling that's bursting with bright, happy flourescent colors glowing brightly under scores of blacklights...

OCTOBER 28, 2016 FRIDAY 4 PM - A HORSE OF A DIFFERENT COLOR

We just had an excellent long talk with the show manager at WIARD'S ORCHARDS NIGHT TERRORS in YPSILANTI and you won't believe what they just did!

First of all real quick...we truly admire how many haunts are able to reinvent themselves year after year and that's great... but check this out...the WIARD'S HAYRIDE has just been revamped midseason! There's new makeup/characters, new scenes, new lines, and new audio soundtracks. So essentially...even if you saw it before, you ain't seen nothin' yet!   www.HauntedHouseMichigan.com

CARPE DIEM, BABY!

After getting feedback from people as they're leaving the hayride WIARD'S started brainstorming how to CRANK THE CRAZINESS TO ELEVEN... everything starts as an idea after all... oh and check this out one of the main new scenes this year in the hayride was thought of just a couple days before opening day of the season... it was nip and tuck but was finally ready five minutes before show time! For you haunt operators out there...does any of this sound familiar? Haha

OCTOBER 27, 2016 THURSDAY 3 PM - Just looking at the website for DARKSYDE ACRES, and their blog is hilarious! Humor goes great with haunting, check this out - www.darksydeacres.com/blog

OCTOBER 26, 2016 WEDNESDAY 5 AM - IT MUST BE A SIGN

It's happening again.

We keep hearing about a certain haunt we haven't been to and it's making us think there's got to be a very good reason why.

Last year it was the HAUNTED PRISON EXPERIENCE in OHIO...after hearing about it from haunters all over we went...and lucky us it was their last year...

This time it's DARKSYDE ACRES in JONESVILLE...the girl at the CVS Drug Store...people at various haunts...a guy who wrote to us that moved to Michigan from Pennsylvania said he was going there...had also already been to ROTTEN MANOR and loved it BTW...

There's only one more weekend...rats we didn't make it to THE HAUNT yet...oh no TERROR ON 27 and SHAWHAVEN are beckoning too...JACKSON'S UNDERWORLD is totally insane and reminds us of the old HUDSON'S DEPT. STORE in DETROIT...SCREAM PARK in NILES is 44 acres packed with primo stuff...REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS at the TURKEY FARM in ROMULUS is a trip and a half...NIGHTMARE ON HARRIS STREET at THE PUMPKIN FACTORY is down the block in BELLEVILLE...and then of course WIARD'S in YPSILANTI...and OH NO it's the last year for BRANDYWINE CEMETARY also in YPSI...that's gonna be off-the-hook...decisions, decisions...hey Stewie invent me a TIME MACHINE to make some MORE HAUNTING DAYS PLEASE...we're still stoked for the adventure with great GUSTO & PASSION!

OCTOBER 24, 2016 MONDAY 4 AM - KILLER KLOWNS SLIM, SHORTY AND FATSO SPOTTED AT BURGER KING IN GRAND RAPIDS!

Oh wait, never mind... that was Elvis...let's make that SPOTTED IN BIG SPLASH AT LOCAL TOLEDO MEGA HAUNT DEBUT!

Okay, here's the deal...our film friend from New York was in town over the weekend, and we had really hoped to take him to WIARD'S on Sunday as the weather was unseasonably warm.

Alas there was other business to attend to, and that didn't work out. But he also asked about haunts we had seen since his last visit here that he might like, and right away I thought to show him the pictures I took on my point-and-shoot at HAUNTED PLANET EXPERIENCE in Toledo last Friday night.

They have an amazing mini museum of movie madness memorabilia at this haunt! There's original movie theater posters, as well as masks and models created with the original motion picture molds from such classic movies as KILLER KLOWNS FROM OUTER SPACE and CRITTERS.

I handed him the camera to flip through the shots...HE STARTS FLIPPING OUT...said it reminded him of PLANET HOLLYWOOD in FLORIDA where he saw original movie set pieces from GREMLINS and the original face from THE FLY movie in the 1950's.

So here's the "NEW KID IN TOWN," HAUNTED PLANET EXPERIENCE, with a brand new Mega Haunt in Toledo...and the guy from New York once again is talking about how there's nothing like this there...or Cardio Drumming either! Hmmm...

OCTOBER 17, 2016 MONDAY 1 AM - THINKING OUTSIDE THE BIG BOX

Okay... we've been gushing over some of the big guns in the industry and rightfully so. These are some amazing productions, and it's some superhuman stuff to pull this off. We've seen Sky Trackers, cranes, and all sorts of amazing machinery used in haunts.

But the big gun haunts are only part of the picture, so now it's time to gush about two haunts that very likely did not have thousands upon thousands of visitors last Saturday night.

You might say these are more like your mom and pop haunted houses, yet they can be counted on to deliver the goods. Even better, they're both in Western Wayne County and make an awesome two-fer haunt journey.

We're talking about REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS in ROMULUS and NIGHTMARE ON HARRIS STREET at THE PUMPKIN FACTORY in BELLEVILLE.

REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS has an amazing miniature city on the grounds, and can be the source of many adventures all on its own. There's a ghost ship that can be boarded, as well as a train and much more.

And the haunt? IT'S KILLER...EVERYTIME. Not only that, but FRANKENSTEIN HIMSELF has taken up residence here. What better endorsement could you possibly hope for? (see various archived reviews)

The ticket booth building at REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS is a show in itself, and also sports some amazingly tasty vittles that you won't be able to stop eating once you start! Here's their info - 18910 Merriman Road, Romulus, MI 48174  phone # (734) 753-9187

NIGHTMARE ON HARRIS STREET is celebrating 40 YEARS IN BUSINESS!!! Hmmm...they must be doing something right.  ;)

The main feature at NIGHTMARE is a hayride with lots of original artwork and some really cool twists. As you make your way onto the grounds, you get an inkling of what you're in for, because the resident witch lives in a small house there. Step right up and look closely inside if you dare, but please be advised she is authorized to maim and kill stalkers and Peeping Tom's.

Oh yeah... THE PUMPKINS!  There's hundreds if not thousands of them!

And their main building has a really cool store as well as world class food served up at a great price. Hey, vigorous haunting requires proper sustenance! One awesome entry we never would have expected was stuffed cabbage soup to rival that of any Polish restaurant!

But back to the pumpkins. This is a pumpkin farm after all...you can find the one that's just right for you and your jack-o'-lantern plans.  And their pumpkin pie is to die for fabulous and brought them nationwide recognition in a major magazine article about Michigan!

There's no fancy website or social media accounts, but who needs spinning graphics when you're already going strong at 40 years running?! Here's their info - NIGHTMARE ON HARRIS STREET, 48651 Harris, Belleville, MI 48111 phone # (734) 461-1835

OCTOBER 16, 2016 SUNDAY 3 PM - THE MASTERS TOUCH

OMG! I just looked at the photo gallery on the website of THE REALM OF DARKNESS...WOW... the colors... the designs... the astonishing makeup...the widely varying emotions invoked... the theatrical quality sets...the ridiculously insane attention to detail.  You see new things every time you go through! Lookie here - http://therealmofdarkness.com/gallery/

If you've never been to a top-level professional haunt of this caliber, you owe it to yourself to get your butt over to THE REALM OF DARKNESS. You might even win a thousand bucks (or $500 for 2nd prize) if you go on Devil's Night...and this is for real...NOT an Urban Legend thing! www.TheRealmOfDarkness.com

In case you didn't hear, in the biggest haunt news of the season, the announcement has been made that THE REALM OF DARKNESS is moving to Mississippi (possibly as soon as next year but for sure by 2018)!

So time is of the essence, if you want to see this masterful creation from not only one of the most creative, but nicest people in the business! Denise has even helped competitors slay their own dragons of all shapes, sorts, and sizes through the years in an impressive display of THE GOLDEN RULE at work!

And it was Denise that told us we simply HAD to check out SCREAM PARK in NILES which we finally did. We actually received a kind invitation from SCREAM PARK for a return visit recently...decisions, decisions...RATS! We missed THE HAUNT last year...we need to get back to DARKSYDE ACRES too...then there's the NEW MEGAHAUNT in TOLDEO called HAUNTED PLANET EXPERIENCE from the creator of the now defunct HAUNTED PRISON EXPERIENCE in MANSFIELD, OHIO.

Whoops...gotta run to CARDIO DRUMMING...stay tuned my little monkeys...

OCTOBER 16, 2016 SUNDAY 5 AM - CITIES AFLAME IN ROCK AND ROLL / FREAK OUT IN A MOONAGE DAYDREAM, OH YEAH...

Okay, it was actually LENOX TOWNSHIP last night, as both HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR and SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK had the largest crowds we've ever seen at either haunt! Fortunately, both of them are set up to handle thousands upon thousands of happy haunters and things were running smoothly all around.

The moon was shining brightly, and at times unusual cloud formations passed through it to produce stunning visuals no man could ever create! Hmmm...could you call that GOD'S LIQUID SKY? haha  ;)

HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR had a radio remote broadcast going from Channel 955 WYCD and SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK featured a live rock band that really kicked out the jams, with fabulous sound quality to boot.

At HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR, we saw the coolest cat ever! Look for him on the left at the entrance to the Road Kill Café. SCAREFEST SCREAM PARK has a one-of-a-kind spinning artwork piece that combines fire and geometry in a most unique way. You won't be able to miss it!

Our only regret from the night was there's just so much to do at both haunts that we simply didn't have time to do everything.  But we made sure to do the hayrides and walk-through haunts at both places, and they delivered the goods in spades.

Hey, they pretty much have to because this is the most competitive market on the planet seeing as DETROIT IS THE WORLD CAPITAL OF HAUNTED HOUSES!

OCTOBER 15, 2016 SATURDAY 7 PM - HAPPY SWEETEST DAY!

Why not give your sweetie a big thrill, and go to your local neighborhood haunted house tonight?

The weather is unseasonably warm, so the outdoor haunts will be prime tonight! You could even wear shorts, and of course it's also the perfect excuse for the girls to wear their most skimpy haunt garb. We personally authorize this type of behavior, subject of course to local jurisdiction which we would never suggest you ignore.

OCTOBER 15, 2016 SATURDAY 5 PM - HEROES AND ICONS

OMG! You will NOT believe who we ran into last night at SLAUGHTER HOUSE in FOWLERVILLE...

We have no idea how they pulled this one off! Check out who the special guests are this year at SLAUGHTER HOUSE   no less than Hillary Rodham Clinton and Donald Trump themselves!

THE GLOVES COME OFF

You think you saw some fireworks between the presidential candidates during the debates? That's peanuts as The Donald would say, and he proves it big time when he makes his special appearance exclusively at SLAUGHTER HOUSE in thieir new show THE PURGE - ELECTION YEAR. You better get your butt over there, real quick before The Donald digs his own grave and jumps in it face first. www.slaughterhouseadventure.com

OCTOBER 15, 2016 SATURDAY 4:45 PM - POISON DARTS & DOWN-A-CLOWN

No, it's not The Donald's latest rantings about foreigners or Democrats.

It's two of the new carnival games at THEATRE BIZARRE this year, which for the first time takes place over two weekends this year.

HALF A TON OF CANDY CORN FROM THE ROCKY PEANUT COMPANY!

This thing is off the hook insane crazy! Last night was opening night and it was totally sold out, but you still have one more chance next week. It takes place at Masonic Temple in Detroit at a building that's a whopping 250,000 ft.².  And there are 1,037 rooms, many of which have not even been explored yet!

This event spans eight floors and is built to accommodate 4500 guests!  750 staff members make it all work like clockwork for this 16 year event, which got its start first at the Michigan State Fairgrounds as a risque one night only carnivalesque party for friends and family around Halloween.

The guy who put it together was famous for saying "No one was going to tell us no!"  But sure enough, the city DID tell them "NO!" in 2010, and that's when they moved Theatre Bizarre to Masonic Temple. www.theatrebizarre.com

This year's theme is HAIL ZOMBO, and take a wild guess what Zombo is? YUP he's a clown and in fact, the chief mascot of Theatre Bizarre. One of the key installations this year is a giant shrine to Zombo including a 213-figure motion controlled diorama that took them three years to make.

There was an excellent front-page article yesterday in the Detroit Free Press about Theatre Bizarre, and it takes you behind the scenes for an inside glimpse of this wildness - http://www.freep.com/story/entertainment/2016/10/13/theatre-bizarre-2016-detroi t-masonic-temple/92017008/

One really cool thing that sets this apart is that it's a costume mandatory masquerade, and as such is the largest of its kind in the world!

So there's another awesome world record for Detroit!

OCTOBER 14, 2016 FRIDAY 1 PM - We're getting excited for a WILD WEEKEND! Many amazing adventures await those who burn with passion for that crazy unique thrill that ONLY comes from haunting in DETROIT - THE WORLD CAPITAL OF HAUNTED HOUSES!

OCTOBER 14, 2016 FRIDAY 3 AM - WORD ON THE STREETS 2016 / EPISODE #1 (conclusion)

First to recap: So I'm waiting in line at a CVS DRUG STORE in DEARBORN a couple days ago, and the girl just ahead of me was wearing a T-shirt from HALLOWEEKENDS AT CEDAR POINT in SANDUSKY, OHIO.

I asked her if she had gone to the haunts at CEDAR POINT. She said it was like five years ago, and heard that it had gotten a lot better since then. That's been our understanding too, and honestly we do want to try the haunt at Cedar Point someday.

Only problem is that every time we get to Sandusky, we can't resist going to GHOSTLY MANOR instead which has always blown us away! (see various archived reviews)

Then I invited her to talk about haunts in Michigan. She had not yet gone haunting this season, but last year she tried two and especially loved one of them.

"Cool! Which haunt was it?"

Whoops, she couldn't remember the name, there's just so many of them. No problem...with minimal prompting and hearing that it was "out past Ann Arbor," we quickly determined that she had been to DARKSYDE ACRES in JONESVILLE.

We missed them last year, but always had a blast in previous seasons.

They have one really unique building they use to fabulous advantage. It's a really long rectangular building, with a super long continuous hallway that goes right down the center of the building.

You can see all the way through the building from beginning to end. But what you can't see is all the crazy things lurking in the rooms to the left and right of this super long hallway.

And we've seen DARKSYDE ACRES bumper stickers around town too. It must be an omen or sign that we need to get our butts out there again ASAP. Leave the lights OFF for us, RJ!

OCTOBER 13, 2016 THURSDAY 11 PM - MEMORIES, DREAMS & REFLECTIONS

The impact of ERWIN'S HAUNT CLOSING is still settling in, and brings to mind some of our earliest memories of haunting in Michigan.

It was "rites of passage" kind of thing that you just had to go to ERWIN'S and take in the whole experience with your friends. It was a bit of a drive from Detroit, which made it even more of an adventure. Pa-diddle!

I can still picture it right now, in my mind's eye... the bonfire is blazing... people cracking up telling the stories of what they liked best... sipping on some hot spiced cider... ohhhh the aroma from the little stick of cinnamon... and of course the hot fresh donuts... and will somebody get me a HONEY CRISP, already?

I am so JONESIN' for a HONEY CRISP RIGHT NOW...but it's gotta be really cold...let's pop some in the cooler filled with ice...got the apple splitter handy...hey is Kroger still open? Gotta go, but lots more cool stuff you won't hear anywhere else to tell you soon...

OCTOBER 13, 2016 THURSDAY 10 PM - THE END OF AN ERA PART 2

Every year haunts come, and every year haunts go. After all, nothing man-made lasts forever. This time it's ERWIN'S ORCHARDS HAUNTED BARN & CORN MAZE in SOUTH LYON closing after 38 years of business, and we're crushed to see them go.

But we understand.

However, the orchard is still active and we plan to stop in if we can and get some cider and those wonderful fresh donuts. ERWIN'S has a really unique multi-grain donut that's out of this world! Get a jar of apple butter too, and try dipping the donuts in it. YUM!

OCTOBER 13, 2016 THURSDAY 4 PM - WORD ON THE STREETS 2016 / EPISODE #1

So I'm waiting in line at a CVS DRUG STORE in DEARBORN a couple days ago, and the girl just ahead of me was wearing a T-shirt from a very famous haunt in OHIO.

Those of you that have met us know we can be rather talkative.  So of course I opened my big mouth, and next thing you know...whoops gotta run to CARDIO DRUMMING...be back later with the ending of this very cool story...and this is FIRST HAND from "the man on the street," or in this case woman...

OCTOBER 13, 2016 THURSDAY 3 PM - C'MON, JUST ONE MORE HAUNT / THE SONIC BOOM ENDING

With the clock ticking down last Saturday night, and our special guest from New York about to become a pumpkin at midnight we had a decision to make. Can we make it to one more haunt?

We're anxious for this guy to go back to New York and tell everybody how amazing the haunts are in Michigan. The last stop of the night would have to be something special, as we already saw two great haunts - HUSH and KRAZY HILDA'S...

NOTHIN' FANCY, STRICTLY FAMILY

The choice was easy, and we made our way to the HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME in INKSTER.

SMALL BUT MIGHTY / OLD SCHOOL NEVER GETS OLD

Is it big? No. Is it fancy? No. Is it killer? Well, we already went there once this year, and we went again, so there's your answer! www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001614513583

OCTOBER 12, 2016 WEDNESDAY 11 PM - AND TO THINK THAT I SAW IT ON MULBERRY STREET

Actually it was Ford Road at KRAZY HILDA'S parking lot. We were just arriving as two young couples were making the way back to their car. One of these couples was especially freaked out, but it had nothing to do with the obligatory chainsaw attack. The atmosphere was actually quite peaceful right there, and no monsters were present.

I asked the guy what happened and he said, "I almost had three heart attacks in there... they knew all my fears!"

Okay, we've seen plenty of people freaked out coming out of haunted houses through the years, but this was quite different. Most of those reactions we observed were immediately after people exited the haunt, often in hot pursuit by chainsaw wielding weirdos.

But this was several minutes after leaving the haunt. You have to walk back up a small hill to the parking lot, so there's plenty of time to cool down. But that's not what happened at all, and it was eye candy deluxe for us. Congratulations to KRAZY HILDA'S for nailing it big time!

OCTOBER 11, 2016 TUESDAY 11 PM - THE END OF AN ERA

We promised big news, and without further ado, here it is THE REALM OF DARKNESS in PONTIAC is closing up shop in Michigan and moving to Mississippi!

The exact timing hasn't been finalized yet, but it could be moving as soon as next year. If that's the case, this season is your very last chance to see this legendary amazing haunt in Michigan.

THE REALM OF DARKNESS has been critically acclaimed by multiple haunt review and rating services like HorrorLust and of course ZIOPTIS! And last year, THE REALM OF DARKNESS won top honors in the ZIOPTIS AWARDS section scoring SUPERNATURAL CERTIFIED SCARIEST HAUNT OF THE YEAR AWARD! www.TheRealmOfDarkness.com

No doubt THE REALM OF DARKNESS will take Mississippi by storm! But we really shouldn't be surprised about this big move, because big people do big things... and this is massive.

So THE REALM OF DARKNESS will begin a new life, and thrill legions of new haunters down south.  The haunt industry is a strange animal where the only constant is change, but that's cool because it makes it always exciting and always interesting!

OCTOBER 9, 2016 SUNDAY 3 AM - TAKE ME DOWN TO PARADISE CITY

It was love at first sight.

Last night at HUSH, our special guest from New York was instantly smitten with a most unusual actress the likes of which we've never seen at any haunt anywhere.

STRANGE BUT WONDERFUL

Her name is MERIT, and she is fabulously exotic!  And when I mentioned to her that I wished our lovable waif friend CANDY FISHALOT could be here to see this, she reacted as if she personally knew her!

KINDRED SPIRITS / WHAT'S IN YOUR LEFT REAR POCKET?

So I gave a test and mentioned to MERIT about how CANDY likes to carry a dead fish in her left pocket at all times.  We won't go into exactly how she proved herself, but suffice it to say that MERIT passed our test with flying colors!

C'mon Zioptis...how did she do it...how did she do it?

Never mind that part... we'll let your imagination fill in the blanks. Nah...better yet, just get your butt down to HUSH and see what's happening with the new show. It's killer!

JUST ONE MORE THING

No, it's not Columbo. No stinky cigars allowed.

It was me last night, trying to convince our friend from New York to take the time to go to one more haunt. It went something like this:

"Actually, I'm on a tight schedule...I need to get back to New York. And besides, it's a documentary about Cardio Drumming... NOT haunted houses!"

"But there's another way cool haunt like 10 minutes down the block on Ford Road here. We have the best haunted houses in Michigan, in fact DETROIT IS THE HAUNTED HOUSE CAPITAL OF THE WORLD! Let me show you a little more of what's happening here..."

"Really, how could it compare to what we just experienced here at HUSH?"

"It's not like that...sure the haunts are competing with each other, but they're not comparing themselves to each other. They're different as night and day, but each of them does something incredible in their own way. This next one is actually a haunted forest called KRAZY HILDA'S."

"A haunted house in a forest? How can they do that?"

So off to KRAZY HILDA'S we went.

Little did we know the awesome surprise that would hit us the moment we arrived at HILDA'S. IT WAS FABULOUS!

TO BE CONTINUED...

OCTOBER 8, 2016 SATURDAY 4 PM - BIG APPLE DREAMING

We have a special guest from New York joining us tonight on our journey, but we'll only have time to go to one haunt.

So if you have an out-of-town guest and can only take them to one haunt, where do you go? That's a no-brainer.  Just now when my partner and I asked ourselves that question, we agreed it would have to be THE REALM OF DARKNESS.

Rats! Unfortunately, due to travel and logistics considerations, we're not going to be able to hit the REALM and must stay closer to home tonight.

So where will we go? It's gotta be killer, that's for sure. Oh, I know!  Stay tuned, my little monkeys...

OCTOBER 7, 2016  FRIDAY 3:30 PM - DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE HAUNT WHERE...

...it costs $100 to get in, but you get $10 back for each room you make it through?

It sounds incredible, but there's one small problem.  It's not real... this is an urban legend going way back that changes a little bit every year but always returns like zombies in pursuit of your soul.

Now what if I told you I knew of a haunted house where you could walk in, and perhaps walk out later with $1000 if you could prove yourself worthy? Or if you came as second banana in their contest walk out with $500?

It gets better folks, because this one is real! Check it out, it's THE REALM OF DARKNESS DEVILS NIGHT CHALLENGE.

This is going to be totally off the hook outrageously insane, and soon we'll be telling you about some big-time inside dope about REALM! Don't believe anything stupid you may have heard.  We've got the inside story and we'll give it to you straight. www.TheRealmOfDarkness.com

OCTOBER 2, 2016 SUNDAY 3 AM - HOLY DIVER

No... not the Ronnie James Dio song, it was us last night at ROTTEN MANOR.  We couldn't wait for church on Sunday, so we prayed with the nuns there last night.

Huh? Prayed that we make it out of this crazy place alive!

ROTTEN MANOR is one strange place. It appears to be run by nuns, because three of them are in charge of the ticket booth.  But these are not your dad's nuns. They may look all prim and proper, but they're crankin' the TOOL on the PA! What would Mother Mary say? haha

There's been some big changes at Rotten Manor since last year, and we're predicting a very big future for this amazing haunt!  (Review coming soon.)

Our apologies to THE REALM OF DARKNESS for missing them last night. But it's pretty cool to know there's people inside there right now having an amazing experience!

OCTOBER 1, 2016 SATURDAY 5 PM - THE GROWING ANTICIPATION

Last night we saw an angel at ABANDON HAUNTED HOUSE in MELVINDALE, and we got swept into a fit of musical madness at the HAUNTED FUNERAL HOME in INKSTER with an actress from beyond! You can't miss her - she's wearing a sparkling silver gown like a world renowned musician getting ready to play a recital at CARNEGIE HALL in NEW YORK CITY. Great stuff!

So what adventures await us tonight? We have no idea what they might be, but we can't wait to find out and report them back to you in our usual splashy style.

There's no telling what magic dials and secret buttons the haunt owners have been manipulating over since last season ended! We can't wait to see what insane creations and silly circumstances have been customed engineered to be presented in DETROIT - THE HAUNTED HOUSE CAPITAL OF THE WORLD!

SEPTEMBER 30, 2016 FRIDAY 7 PM - BLACK MOON RISING TONIGHT! / DANCING UNDER THE MOONLIT SKY

Check this out here's a REALLY BIG NOTHING you can experience yourself tonight. I'm talking the Black Moon baby, and after tonight you won't get another chance to check this out for years.

It's a rare occasion when the second new moon in a month results in the dark side of the Moon being shown to us. That means you can have your very own BLACK MOON PARTY TONIGHT!

Get together with your friends and don't look at it, because there's nothing to see. It's a shared experience like no other!

Hey, wanna buy some tickets to the submarine races? I'll even give them to you half price. See? I'm a pal after all...

Check out the inside real dope here, but don't tell ANYBODY: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/09/30/black-moon-set-to-rise-tonight-in-rar e-lunar-event---but-what-is/

FEBRUARY 1, 2016 MONDAY 11 PM - Just spotted this wild creative artwork, some of which would be right at home in a haunt! Check it out - short collection at www.bloodyloud.com/surreal-pop-art-todd-schorr/  or the full collection at  www.ToddSchorr.com

NOVEMBER 14, 2015 SATURDAY 10 PM - CUTTING TO THE CHASE

You may have heard us mention before that THE REALM OF DARKNESS in PONTIAC is actually haunted.

Rightfully, anyone should be wary of such claims unless you can personally see documented proof.

Now what if an actual big time church pastor were to tell his entire congregation about UNEXPLAINABLE SUPERNATURAL WEIRDNESS AT THE REALM OF DARKNESS AND SHOW THE VIDEO PROOF???

We'll post the full back story later and IT'S A DOOZIE but for now just check out the video on the following link called "Angels and Demons" from 11/7/15. Don't skip far ahead, as the really good part starts at about 2 minutes and 30 seconds

www.metrocitychurch.tv/media.php?pageID=134

NOVEMBER 8, 2015 SUNDAY 10 PM - YOU CAN'T MAKE THIS STUFF UP - PART 2 OF A 3 PART TRUE STORY   

This is an amazing 3 part story, and we already told you part 1...but without some key details on purpose...and we'll get to those in a bit...

But first here's part 1 again: OCTOBER 27, 2015 TUESDAY 3 PM - Can't say where...but we're involved in a video shoot tonight at a big time haunt in connection with a major organization. 

And then OCTOBER 28, 2015 WEDNESDAY 2 AM - The video shoot went well, and final footage will be taken today...this is going to be seen by many thousands!

Now here's part 2, and I want you to experience this just as thousands already have. So imagine this for a moment - first we rewind to last Saturday night which was Halloween or the following Sunday morning...

You're going to a church service of all things, where they have a killer band and services on Saturday evening and Sunday morning. Sometimes the pastor's message is on giant video screens, and when service starts you see the video called The Battle of Unbelief from Oct. 31, 2015 which also appears at this website: www.metrocitychurch.tv/media.php?pageID=134  

OCTOBER 31, 2014 FRIDAY 2:30 PM - LET THE SNOW HOWL

Did you ever plan to do something fun with your friends...and then some sort of EXTREME CIRCUMSTANCE HITS...but you go anyway and have the time of your life?

Down the road, those are the stories remembered the most and talked about as well.

It's just human nature...the prim-and-proper everything was perfect just as planned events never get re-told and embellished later on.

HOOTIN' AND HOWLIN' IN THE BLUSTERY SNOW - THE GLASS IS WAY MORE THAN HALF FULL 

The weather for Halloween in Michigan and Ohio is horrible, with rain today and snow and howling winds later right during trick-or-treat time.

That's a good thing.

HUH?

At its' very core, Trick-or-Treating is far more about shared experiences than the sugar-fueled frenzy which fades quickly.

The shared experience of going out on Halloween despite the lousy weather will last far longer than the secret stash of Snickers bars...and then someday...it's like "Oh yeah? That's nothing...one time we actually went TRICK OR TREATING IN THE SNOW...there was gale force winds...nobody else went and we filled three pillow cases...except Freddie...he filled SIX pillow cases...they had to pump his stomach later..."

Thank you, Mother Nature.

Rest In Peace, Adam T. Ladd
June 19, 1974 May 30, 2014