REVIEW SPOTLIGHTS OF THE DAY LENOX TOWNSHIP HAUNTED FARM OF TERROR 28405 26 Mile Road, Lenox Township, MI (586) 203-7222 or www.hauntedfarmofterror.com ZIOPTIS SEZ 2011- TAKE A RIDE ON THE WILD SIDE! Actually, make that take a WALK on the wild side too. The walk thru haunt here is killer too! One thing that immediately caught our attention in the walk thru was some weird music that sounded like a Theramin. Theramin was the first electronic musical instrument, played by varying hand movements around its metal rods. You'll make some dubious new friends here, and see things happen that shouldn't! The presentation is flawless, precisely designed by experienced masters of the art. And we really liked the super old organ, but one of the coolest sounds produced here came from a live actor who is not human. Not kidding. All sorts of weirdos will try to get you to believe some twisted, mixed up stuff here. Don't fall for it. But you probably will, because these actors seem to have been trained in many methods of psychological persuasion you will be powerless to resist. Or maybe you can. But either way, you'll have a blast in this crazy house! The hayride here is super intense with great interaction and scares for sure, but you'll also see some amazing large scale eye candy. One favorite was just before the end, and is best when there's no wind so the fog can accumulate. The cart stops so you can "watch a movie at the drive-in." They have a large movie screen, showing a horror flick. But we also noticed HUNDREDS of light beams emanating from the trees. It's stunningly beautiful! Wow, how did they do that? Here's how: On the other side of the trees is the parking lot which is illuminated by a large street light, probably a sodium vapor lamp. It's so bright that it shines thru the spaces between the tree branches, and produces a giant moonflower type projector of sorts. It's outer space, right here in Lenox Township! In fact, Outer Space is the theme this year. The host of the ride tells a story throughout the journey of an alien invasion that occured on this very site way back in 1867. He has a special LED flashlight he uses to produce a mini light show, and he cues the music for the various scenes too for flawless synchronization. Near disasters and close up high intensity monster action come fast and furious at a breakneck pace. We really liked the spiked hair dude that suddenly appeared when his style of music came on. Of course, he quickly found the most vulernable girl available and went to work. We would expect no less, and we were not disappointed. But he also got the crowd so charged up, everybody started boppin' with the tunes and the WHOLE CART WAS SHAKING! Later a witch burning is held, super giants spiders attack, and we really liked the super foggy barn with giant weird creatures popping out from all over. Mood music by Rob Zombie completes the setting, and a giant reptile attack precedes a massive invasion of goons right on the cart! Chainsaws pressed against the cart inches away from you shake things up even more, and the screaming girls often drown out the monsters themselves! Then the host turns the tables on you, insisting you actually cheer for a mad scientist who want to perform hideous experiements...on YOU. A cemetery scene accentuates the beautiful forest this haunt enjoys. And the industrial power fog machines ensure the zombies have a dramatic entrance as they appear to emerge from dreamland while "Sweet Dreams" by Marilyn Manson is playing to reinforce the idea. Another favorite scene of ours features multiple real horses, including one that's WHITE. And we really liked the circus-like annoucement that leads to an attack of polka dot clowns with great makeup. Ever heard the phrase "Hell hath no fury like that of a woman scorned?" This haunt gives you a first hand insight into this when we're introduced to a bride-to-be that's still waiting for her overdue groom. Her bridal gown is absolutely gorgeous, but then "Beautiful People" by Marilyn Manson starts playing and she freaks out. She charges onto the cart, flailing about and screaming hysterically. But even her voice is no match for a slew of chainsaws inches away, and she fades away into the darkness... Finally, the cart stops for your "drive in movie" that we gushed about earlier. AN AMAZING EXPERIENCE THAT WILL WOW YOU OVER AND OVER. There's lots of other cool stuff to do here too, and the food has become known as some of the best available at any haunt in their "Road Kill Cafe." Also you can shoot live zombies with paintball guns, or relax around the bonfire watching movies on the big screen. CIDER, CIDER EVERYWHERE...BUT WHICH ONE SHALL I DRINK? Have you ever turned on the radio, and instantly been transported down memory lane as a certain song reminds you of a certain person, time, or event? That's what I call a "musical bookmark" of your life. But can a certain TASTE also be a life bookmark? After what happened here last night, I say YES. Ok, we rolled into town in our magic bus as usual. The haunt operator was starting to show us around as usual, but I had to stop him. "DUDE! I absolutely MUST have a big gulp of that incredible apple cider you guys have!" We made our way over to the "Road Kill Cafe" and I got my fix. "AHHHH, now what were you saying Mr. Haunt Operator?" World class food and drink has become a part of the Michigan Haunt Experience. Haunters get hungry and since our bodies are primarily liquid, thirst is inevitable too. This haunt has an arrangement with a local apple orchard, and brings in fresh cider every day that has NOT been pasteurized. It's gonna disappear so fast, it's unnecessary and would only adulterate the taste. You CAN taste the difference, and once you do you won't be able to forget it. Put all these experiences together, mix well, and you can see why this haunt packs 'em in big time! ROMULUS REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS Huron Turkey Farm 18910 Merriman Road, Romulus, MI 48174 (corner of Sibley, entrance on Sibley) (734) 753-9187 or www.myspace.com/huronturkeyfarm ZIOPTIS SEZ 2011 - A GREAT FAMILY ADVENTURE WHERE FANTASIES COME TRUE! This is a killer haunt for sure. But there's SO much more here for kids of all ages, including a ghost ship you can board. Now you're a pirate, ready to explore! There's miniature buildings of all sorts too, but not so small you can't actually get in them and jump into all sorts of fun role playing. And sometimes the wackos here pop up in these buildings, and then it really gets crazy! A slightly haunted kiddie playground is styled to look like a castle, and features a slide exit. It's really clever, and a sure winner with little ones too afraid of the main attraction. Look for the lit up skull to the right of the walk thru haunt. Be sure to fully explore the ticket sales building. It's also a mini museum of haunted goodies and a source of some incredibly yummy, custom decorated cookies and baked goods that melt in your mouth. Check out the life size Dracula on the left side of the building. It is SO realistic, especially the eyes. You almost expect him to jump out at you, like a frozen actor that lunges at just the right moment for "GOTCHA!" The main attraction is the REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS, which is a walk thru haunt in a permanent structure. Life's games have many boundaries. In football there's a line of scrimmage. In tennis, there's the singles and doubles lines. In hockey, there's a....whatever zone. Or ever hear of drawing a line in the sand, as a warning not to come any further? Well, they don't have any sand here. They use blood! They have a "BLOOD LINE" you are commanded to stand behind. But that's OK, because it gives you an up close view of an awesome opening sequence featuring the BIGGEST AND MOST REALISTIC FRANKENSTEIN we've seen! There's some delightfully zany analog electronic equipment twists too, with meters to indicate Megavolts, Gigavolts, and even ZIGAVOLTS! Wow, we've never seen it go that far before. They must have watched the Spinal Tap movie where the guy cranks his guitar amp to ELEVEN. Frankenstein is sleeping when we enter, but he's a light sleeper and soon wakes up. When he sits up and opens his big brown peepers, it's like looking into a sad puppy dog's soul. You can't help but feel sorry for him, but then he starts barking orders and issuing warnings. His voice is deeper than Lurch from the Addams Family. Perhaps he's just a misunderstood sweetheart of a guy. Or more likely we should heed his warning that we're about to enter the "GATEWAY OF YOUR DEEPEST FEARS." Throwing caution to the wind as usual, we ignored the warnings and proceeded with reckless abandon. There's so much crazy commotion we can hear ahead, we just have to see what's causing it all! But then right away we can't see at all, and our pupils open wide. Now we're an easy target, vulnerable to unseen monster's whims. We still hear goons everywhere, and there's left over body parts hanging. That can't be a good sign. If we had any sense we'd run out that emergency exit. But that's for chickens, and we feel like hawks tonight. Maybe even vultures. You've got to fend for yourself when you encounter rough characters! Just don't TOUCH any of them though, ok? And they're not supposed to touch you either like at all haunted houses. Also features an excellent black hole, a cool shrinking room, and we absolutely adored our new friend that slithered along with us! She had a green face, and the most bizarre looking eyes. Strangely seductive, yet alarming too as things unfold further. Whoa... she shoots an arrow into your soul with her blazing, piercing gaze...BULLSEYE! Another favorite actor here shows it's not impossible to escape from a straitjacket afterall. He's screaming at the top of his lungs, but his voice is hindered slightly by the cage on his head which is locked tightly shut! So we've got this wild man flailing about with a cage on his head, horrible insects galore, a birthing chamber to squeeze thru...ahhh, that's the life! Also features a short maze after exiting the haunt to complete your journey into the Realm of Haunted Minds! And there's tons of pumpkins in the front yard, which is beautifully decorated and has tons of those deep colored LED light sets. As you're driving up to the lot here, the kids will start to ooh and ahhh! SAIL THE HIGH SEAS TO TURKEY FARM TERROR at REALM OF HAUNTED MINDS!